Life's Little Lessons
by DreamAngel9686
Summary: Bella returns to Forks after being gone for 6 years, when she runs into Edward she is forced to remember what drove her out of town and what secrets does she carry back with her will there be a happy ever after or will love go a different way. OOC AH
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or its Characters.**

**Ok, New Story I am kicking around. The first couple of chapters will flash back a lot to their history and then it will pick up to the present.**

**I hope you like, please let me know if you do.**

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Life's Little Lessons

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Chapter 1

I was trying to hurry to get the things that I needed and get back home to make dinner for Charlie, reading down my list at what I needed.

_Cheese_

_Bread_

_Butter_

_Chicken_

_Basil_

_Tomatoes_

My head was down, and I remembered that I needed tomatoes so I turned to walk over to produce when I walked straight into something hard.

"Oh, I am so sorry" I stammered to the man's back.

He turned around to face me "No that's o-ok" his eyes wide as he looked into mine.

I saw a face that I hadn't seen for 6 years staring back at me.

"Bella" he said amazement shining through his shock.

"Edward, How are you" I asked, never in my wildest (ok maybe wildest) dreams did I ever think I would come face to face with the man, that in high school I dreamt of marrying.

"I'm good Bella, when did you come back into town?" Does he live here, I wondered Renee had never mentioned that he was here, but then again I guess I never really asked.

After our relationship had ended our senior year, we had both moved on, him first (bitterness crept through me, that's odd) and then me, once I went away to college life in Forks faded back into the shadows, now here he was staring me in the face again.

"I came home to help Renee take care of Charlie, his having a hard time since the accident and she thought it would be nice if he had some company" I really didn't need to get into the details of the other reason why I was home.

"How is Char-" he started to ask when his pocket started beeping, pulling out a pager, he turned to me and said "That's the hospital, I have to go, I hope to see you again while your in town" and he set his basket down and left.

I picked it up looking at it, razors, shampoo, deodorant, bread, toothpaste nothing urgent but still necessary, I don't know what made me do it, but I bought his items, placing in a separate, nylon reusable tote bag and I took them to the Hospital.

"Bella, Bella, Bella what are you doing, this is odd, just forget about him, this can only bring trouble" I was talking out loud to myself as I drove the familiar route; I parked in the parking lot. I grabbed a piece of paper out of my bag and scribbled a quick note.

"_Edward,_

_Thought you might like these._

_Bella"_

Throwing it in the bag and zipping it shut, I walked in, and looking up from behind the desk was another face I didn't think I would see again.

"Jessica" I asked knowing quite well it was her, she hadn't changed at all, except for her hair color, and maybe a boob job but I couldn't be sure.

"Oh my gosh, Bella Swan what are you doing here"

"I'm back in town for a bit, anyways I need a small favor" I said setting the bag down on the desk.

"I bumped into Edward at the store and he got paged and forgot his stuff, could you give him this bag please" I asked her faced changed the minute I said his name, things in this town sure hadn't changed where Edward was concerned.

"Sure," she said taking the bag, "Well okay then, see you around Jess," and I turned and walked back out the door.

I sat in my car, and I remembered Edward.

_***Flashback***_

_Sitting in Alice's backyard, with her a Rosalie about a month after I had moved to town summer before freshman year, a year later we were enjoying one of the rare sunny days in Forks. _

_Charlie had taken the job of Police Chief and we had moved, it was rough starting high school in a new town, but I had became friends with Alice and her friend Rose quite quickly as well as Alice's brother Emmett and Rose's brother Jasper, Alice's other brother Edward had been another story, he didn't want to be my friend, he grumbled when I was around, for no good reason at all._

_We were enjoying the sun, when Edward had walked by shovel in hand grumbling about lounging around and work being done._

_We all exchanged glances as Rose and Alice rolled theirs eyes at Edwards's moodiness. _

"_I'm going in to grab some water, do you want anything" I asked getting up._

"_Water" they both said not even looking up from their magazines. I laughed as I walked inside I turned into the kitchen and walked into something hard, knocking me back a bit, I jumped as I looked up into Edward's face._

"_Sorry" I said walking by; he grumbled something about watching where I was going._

_I grabbed three waters and headed back outside. I could feel him glaring at me as I made my way back outside._

"_One day, I will find out just what I did to Edward" I said handing out the waters and plopping back down into my chair._

"_As we've said a million times, don't let him get to you he's just Edward." Rose said._

"_Yeah, he's always been this way" Alice agreed._

_But he wasn't always this way, I had seen him laughing and having a good time, girls at school were always vying for his attention, when we were with a crowd he was quite pleasant, but then when it was just the six of us he was always grouchy._

_At first I thought it was because everyone was paired off except for him, Rose was dating Emmett and Alice was with Jasper. But that didn't bother him in the least, or so it seemed._

_What bothered him was me, he had dated a few times through the year, and I had too for some reason I was more popular here with the guys then I was in Phoenix._

_Alice and Rose tried to pass it off as jealousy at first because I had started seeing Mike a few weeks into the school year, but Edward seemed to be happier to be around me when I was dating someone._

_Mike and I were always on and off, we date for a few months and then it would die down and then it would start all over again, I cared about him but it wasn't the type of relationship that I had seen would last forever._

_***End Flashback***_

I snapped out of my flashback, and headed back to Charlie's I still needed to start making Charlie's favorite Brushetta Chicken Pasta.

**EPOV**

Running into Bella at the store was a shock, I didn't think that I would see her again, after she left for college, she seemed to just drop off of the planet Alice and Rose had talked to her a couple of times but even they hadn't heard from her in a while.

I was almost relieved to get called to the hospital, I didn't even think about the things in my basket that I needed, I just left I would have to go back tomorrow.

I was finishing up medical school, Carlisle had gotten me a place here at the hospital and I was enjoying my time back at home with my family. My patient was stable again and I was heading back out again, when I heard the voice I dreaded.

"Dr. Cullen" Jessica said smiling at me the minute I turned back towards her.

"Yes Jessica" I tried to remain friendly, however Jessica always wanted to relive the few months we had dated sophomore year.

"This was dropped off for you" she motioned towards a bag, I picked it up and carried it out the door, the less I said to her the better.

Climbing in my Volvo, I actually stopped to look at what was in my hand, it was a eco-friendly shopping bag from Neely's Grocery Store, and in it was the contents of my basket and a note.

I pulled the note out of the bag and was hit by her scent, the familiar scent washing over me; I actually put it up to my nose and sniffed the Strawberries and Freesia scent in.

"_Edward,_

_Thought you might like these._

_Bella"_

It was short but my mind went over it a half a dozen times, why Bella and I had not been a couple for almost six years, I couldn't honestly say that I hadn't thought about her but I had hurt her too much to ever think of going down that road again.

**BPOV**

I had only been in town three days on the second I had seen him, and now I was taking a trip down memory lane literally.

Driving through Forks, I visited all the places that I remembered. I pulled into the parking lot at First Beach, walking down and sitting on the beach I remembered some better times with Edward.

_***Flashback***_

_Edward and I had become friends, it was the beginning of Junior year and he was much more pleasant to be around, we bantered back and forth with each other, teasing and joking around. I began to wonder about what Alice and Rose had said all along about him having feelings for me and hiding them._

_It was movie night, we all settled in to watch a movie on a chilly November night in the dark media room set up in the Cullen's basement, the happy couples were snuggled together, I sat down on the loveseat and Edward sat down next to me, this wasn't a new thing since we had become friends. The couches were set up like a theater and we were in the back row._

_I grabbed my favorite fluffy blanket and settled back to watch "Interview with a Vampire" it was Alice's Choice and she had a serious crush on Tom Cruise and Brad Pitt._

_We weren't far into the movie, when I changed my position placing one leg underneath me and relaxing my arm down next to it, my hand had been there for a bit and then I felt his hand intertwine with mind, something in itself that sent my heart beat racing, this was new, he had never done this before his settled himself into the middle of the love seat, and I contemplated my own move for few minutes before I shifted my body next to his our shoulders were touching, his finger was caressing my hand. At this point I was glad that we were in the back of a dark room, because this was something that I didn't know just what to say._

_I leaned into him further, it was comfortable it felt like I was meant to sit there up against him, my head went back into his chest, he leaned his head against mine and his lips brushed my forehead._

"_What the hell" my mind was screaming, screw the movie I couldn't focus on this now"_

_We sat like that through the whole movie, his hand caressing mine. When the movie was coming to a close, we shifted ourselves into a normal position._

_Luckily no one witnessed our exchange and as I headed up to bed with Alice and Rose, I turned to take one last look at him, he met my eyes for a moment and then looked away, and this confused me._

_It was like they knew without even having to ask, "Bella would you like to tell us what your favorite part of the movie was" Alice asked her eyes sparkling._

_Rose's eye brows raised and she turned to face me as well, my red face getting redder._

"_Edward held my hand through the movie and we kind of cuddled" I said trying not to sound like a girl with a crush, because at the moment that was how I felt, I hadn't had feeling for him before besides friendship and even that was new, now I was full on crushing on him._

_We discussed this new event, for a long time, Alice claiming that she had called it years ago. Finally we all fell asleep and my sleep was filled with dreams of Edward._

_We awoke and headed down to breakfast, I was anxious to see him again and my heart flutter with nerves at the thought of seeing him._

_But he wasn't there, and he didn't come back for the entire day. Something puzzled me, Alice and Rose asked about him and I was grateful for them asking._

"_He left a while ago, said he had somewhere to be and took off" Emmett said piling pancakes onto his plate._

_We all exchange looks and shrugged and ate before Emmett finished off the stack. I busied myself with the things that we normally did on Saturdays we went down to Port Angeles and shopped for a bit, had a nice lunch and I tried not to think about him._

_His car was in the driveway when we pulled in and Alice and Rose both gave me knowing looks as we headed in. However we stopped dead in our tracks when the first thing we saw was Edward with a redhead half sitting on his lap, whispering in his ear before kissing him._

_I didn't understand, was I totally off last night when I thought that he wanted me, he had held me and kissed my head his lips lingering there for longer then necessary. I walked past a stunned Alice and Rose and headed up into their room, Edward breaking his kiss to watch me walk up the stairs._

_I was in the room and seated when the girls walked in._

"_What the hell is going on" Rose said her bluntness made me chuckle a bit._

"_I have no clue, I guess I was wrong last night" I said hoping that wouldn't see how confused I was by this._

"_Bella, it's ok to be a little hurt, after last night you have every right. I am going to go down there and ask him what the deal is" Alice said, nobody messed with her, she was small but she could hold her own._

"_No Ali, its fine" I said more demanded._

_We hung out in the room until Emmett and Jasper came in, "Who is that wrapped around Edward," Emmett asked sitting down next to Rose._

_I shrugged, "I think she goes to our school, she's a year younger then you guys though" Jasper said pointing to Alice and I, we were all in the same grade along with Edward. Emmett, Jasper and Rose were seniors._

_It wasn't that Edward hadn't dated before but he had never been into PDA at least not around me and not after what I thought had happened last night. And Jasper was right I did recognize her after the fact._

_Esme called us all down to dinner, and I wasn't happy about the fact that she was seated next to him, that is where I usually sat. I sat down at the end of the table in one of the empty chairs, feeling a little left out because I was so far away from everyone._

_Edward introduced her to Carlisle as he come home from work, a bit shocked at the new seating arrangement, "Dad, I would like to introduce you to my girlfriend Kate" he said smiling at her._

_Girlfriend, ok that was unexpected, everyone looked at him, then Rose and Alice looked at me, I shrugged and went back to eating._

_Dinner was over, and I decided to forgo my second night of staying, Alice and Rose tried to talk me into staying but as Kate and Edward settled down the group, I said no, climbing in my truck and driving home. My heart hurting a bit, how could I have been so wrong, and what was with him last night, did he have a girlfriend last night I wondered._

_Kate_

_***End Flashback***_

I knew that my return here would be full of memories, but seeing him had made it worse. My cell phone rang in my pocket.

_Baby just give me one reason - Give me just one reason why  
Baby just give me one reason - Give me just one reason why I should stay  
Because I told you that I loved you  
And there ain't no more to say_

I groaned at just the thought of talking to my now ex Jared, I needed to change that ringtone soon. He had given me no reason to stay and actually told me he would prefer if I didn't, which was fine with me at that point.

"Jared"

"Wow Bellie what's with the attitude" I hated it when he called me Bellie it used to be cute now it wasn't.

"Can I help you" I tried not to bark it out, but I didn't want to talk to him.

"Well I know that you are in Forks, but I just wondered when you wanted me to get Sydney back to you, I don't think she wants to be here anymore" he added a little downhearted at the last phrase.

Sydney…that was going to change things and I knew it.

"Ask her when she would like to come here and then call me back and we will make arrangements, I know mom and dad would love to see her" I added.

Hanging up, I cursed out loud. Hoping that I could just get through my stay here and then head back to where ever home would be.

I had published two books and was working on my third, writing had always been my passion I studied in college, and had graduated even with all the obstacles that I faced a long the way, I went to work for a publishing company when one of my bosses and good friends Tanya had found one of my stories and insisted it be submitted. The publisher loved it and so did the public, I had written best sellers and was my next novel was highly anticipated.

Jared and I had met in College we hit it off, he helped me threw the rough times and I thought our love would last forever, we were engaged until a month ago when he announced that he didn't love me anymore and that it was time to make a clean break.

A clean break, as if that were possible he was the only father Sydney had ever known in her 6 years of life, my daughter was my life, being apart from her was hard but it was the arrangement we had made that she would stay a month with him over the summer. It had only been a little over a week.

I smiled at the thought of Sydney she was my shining beacon in the hard times, one could never ask for a better baby she was pleasant and hardly ever cried, and she was growing up to be a very smart young lady she loved school and was looking forward to going into first grade.

Did I want her in Forks? Renee would be happy to have her, she doted on her when her and Charlie had come to visit us. Charlie spoiled her rotten as well, giving her anything her little heart wanted and she loved her Pappy Charlie.

The rain started then, and I headed back home going the long way past the Cullen's home where I had spent so much time, part of me wanted to drive up the long driveway and see them, but we hadn't parted on the best of terms, they knew why I was leaving but what would they think about the last 6 years of limited contact.

I missed Rose and Alice so much, we had all tried to keep in touch but it was hard and painful. Alice was in Italy studying high fashion and Rose was on the East Coast with Emmett and Jasper. But I missed them everyday.

_***Flashback***_

_Edward and Kate were always on and off, and when they were off, Edward gravitated back to me, it would last a couple of days sometimes a week, I always did a good job at not letting myself fall for him because they would always get back together._

_January rolled around and Edward and Kate had broken up again, and he was trying to be more then a friend to me again, I held off for two weeks but then my heart let me believe that we could be together, and I had fallen for it again. And it was wonderful we were dating, going out and doing group things, laughing and having a goodtime. I was in love with him and was hoping that he loved me too,_

_But I could tell after a few months that something was off, and I had finally just asked him about it. Except this time was worse then before…_

"_Edward, your so quiet anymore, please I know you have something to say so please just say it." _

"_Bella, I care for you but I still have feelings for Kate" he said, my heart breaking deep down I had known it but it hurt hearing it out loud, I had jumped out of the car and ran into the house._

_I had plans with Rose and Alice the next day so I pulled myself together, and went to meet them at Alice's. Every one knew by now that Edward and I had broken up, Alice and Rose had called and begged me not to cancel on them, not to let Edward's actions come between us._

_So I walked into the house, Emmett came running over grabbing me up in a bear hug, "Em, dude she's turning blue" Jasper chuckled as Emmett set me down._

"_It's good to see you Bella" Jasper said, with his all too knowing look. _

"_Are the girls ready" I asked._

"_Just about" Emmett said trying to usher me to another room, I headed towards the kitchen I wanted to say Hello to Esme, but Emmett tried pulling me the other way._

"_Emmett, I want to say hi to your mom" I said._

"_She's not in there Bells, and you don't want to go in there" he said his eyes telling me exactly what I needed to know. They were in there, it hadn't even been a day._

_Why did he always go running back to her, every time they broke up he would play with me, and I would fall for it, and then they would get back together. But this time we had actually been a couple, this time the hurt went deeper._

"_I'm sorry Bells" Emmett said. _

"_It's not your fault" I just wanted to leave, and I was getting ready to when Rose and Alice came downstairs, Jasper had went to get them._

_We got into the car when all hell broke loose._

"_Let me just tell you, it was not pretty here last night or this morning" Rose started I didn't really want to hear it but she was going to tell me anyways._

"_Why not" I said with a bit of a sniffle, damn it suck it up Bella,_

"_When that little rat got home last night and told everyone you had broken up, I thought Jasper was going to kill him, Emmett was mad and so was Esme." She started._

"_But it got worse this morning" Alice finished, "When he showed up with her in tow, I had never heard Esme yell like that except when Emmett put blue dye in the rug scrubber to see what would happen" _

_I chuckled at the thought of that. "Why was she yelling" I asked, I knew but it felt good to hear that his family was upset like I was._

"_Because he hurt you and went running back to her, Esme was yelling at him right in front of her" Rose piped in. I felt bad for causing such a mess._

"_Stop it Bella, I can tell that you are trying to put some of this on you and you are not to blame, it is all Edward." Alice said,_

_I tried to enjoy myself but it just wasn't working I wasn't in the mood for shopping, we finished up and headed back to the house, but I knew that they were still there so I left and went home._

_Charlie drug me down to La Push Sunday, Renee was spring cleaning and didn't want either of us underfoot._

_That was when I guess you could say that I re-met Jacob he went to the school down on the reservation and I hadn't been to his house in a long time, that when I saw him he took my breath away he was very handsome. _

_We walked along the beach and I realized that I like spending time with him, he made me feel good about myself._

"_Bella, will you go to dinner with my Friday night" he asked as we were walking back to his house. I didn't even have to hesitate._

"_Yes, I would too" I smiled and it felt good._

_We were inseparable after that, we quickly became a couple and I liked him a lot, we did a lot of things with Alice, Jasper, Rose and Emmett, and they all really liked Jake, but it was still hard to be around Edward, the feelings I had for him were still raw._

_Rose, Emmett and Jasper were heading off to college, and we were all trying to spend as much time together as possible during the summer._

_When school started back up, Alice was depressed because she missed Jasper and Rose, so she hung out with me a lot at my house which was fine because Edward and Kate were always at her house._

_We were seniors, discussing all of our options for college, Alice was going into Fashion and I was looking into Literature, our paths would separate after graduation and it hurt to think about it._

_Edward and Kate continued there on again/off again relationship but he didn't try to mess with me, because I was with Jacob._

_Jacob, I cared about him but I didn't love him, and I knew that he didn't love me, but our relationship was good so why change it._

_Senior year was flying by, graduation was right around the corner. I had been accepted to the University of Arizona and their literature program was one of the best. I decided that it was time to end things with Jacob; because I was going into an early summer course not long after graduation and I knew that it was time._

_He took it very well he was a little hurt and I was too, but we both knew that it was for the best. _

_So my last month of school was spent with Alice, who had been accepted into a prestigious fashion program in Italy. That's when it all went down._

_The day before Graduation, we were at a party thrown by Tyler Crowley and there was obviously something in the punch, we had a couple of cups and weren't feeling the greatest. There was no way I could call Charlie, so Alice called Edward._

_He came and picked us up, thankfully minus Kate. After he dropped Alice off at home he drove me to my house. But he turned off and parked the car. I looked around shocked by this._

"_Bella, I need to talk to you" Oh god here we go again. _

"_Yes, Edward" please don't put me through this now._

"_I miss you Bella, I miss you so much, and when Alice told me that you and Jacob had broken up I didn't realize how happy the news made me, what does that mean Bella" _

_He wanted me to tell him his answer, yeah right._

"_I can't tell you what you feel Edward"_

"_Can you tell me how you feel" he asked. _

"_Why should I Edward, you always do this to me and still after everything you want me to tell you that I love you" oh shit had that come out of my mouth._

"_Do you love me Bella?" _

"_What if I did Edward, it doesn't change anything you and Kate are a couple" I knew they weren't though because Alice had told me earlier they had broken up a week ago, this time it seemed permanent._

"_It would matter a lot, and you know that we aren't together anymore, it won't work with me heading to Harvard and she is going to Seattle" he said and he was rubbing my hand. I knew at that moment, or I should have known that what happened next was doomed, I was going to Arizona._

"_I do love you Edward, but I can't get hurt by you again" I hoped that he would stop there because I couldn't help my feelings if he kept this up._

_Then he leaned over and kissed me, and I gave in. He whispered that he loved me and pulled me into the back of the car, are kisses became more urgent, hands flying everywhere, my shirt was off his was too._

_And then it happened, I lost my virginity to Edward in the back seat of his car, I felt like a country song._

_But I was elated, this was a turning point this hadn't happened before, he kissed me and held onto me the whole way back to my house._

_I was on cloud 9, Edward said he loved me. _

_Charlie and Renee drove me to Graduation where I was reunited with Rose, Emmett, Jasper and a squealing Alice, I looked around for Edward but didn't see him, Mrs. Cope told us to get in line before I had time to really worry about it._

_We graduated and I was surrounded by the Cullen's and my mom and dad, taking pictures with everyone and smiling and laughing._

"_We need Edward" Esme called and motioned for him to come over, when he walked over he was not alone, Kat was holding his hand, I smiled for the picture, he looked at me and then quickly looked away, I ran home, I only lived two miles from school._

_I cried and cried, lying on my bed. The door opened and my bed went down slightly._

"_Bella" Alice said quietly, her and Rose were both looking at me,_

"_What happened" Rose asked, rubbing my back._

_They both sat and listened to me tell them about the talk with Edward last night, and him telling me he loved me, and that we had sex._

_Their anger grew with the last statement, "He is back with Kate" Alice growled and I laid my head back down and cried until I fell asleep._

_I woke up to the doorbell ringing, Charlie and Renee had went to dinner, I made my way down the stairs and opened the door, not really caring how I looked or who it was._

_But the sight of him, made me mad and I tried to slam the door in his face, but he stopped it._

"_Bella please let me explain" Edward begged from my porch_

"_Explain what Edward, every time I turn around you are constantly saying things you shouldn't say to me, and once again you played with my emotions" I said fighting the tears back._

"_I didn't mean for that to happen last night," he said, like that made it better._

"_Why Edward, why are you back with her" I had to know._

"_Because I love her" he said._

"_You said you loved me too" I cried._

"_I do Bella, honestly I do but Kate and I have been together for a while now and I owe it to her to be with her" this made no sense to me._

"_I never want to see you again Edward, never" I yelled and slammed the door this time he didn't stop it._

_I said my goodbyes after two miserable weeks in Forks, trying to enjoy my time with my friends but hurting every time that I saw him, and then him with her was a double stab._

_When I arrived in Arizona I put Forks behind me, vowing to live in the present and not the past._

_College was wonderful, my summer course was a complete joy I had made several new friends and was really enjoying my life. _

_When he did it to me again._

_I was getting ready for my morning class when I it hit me, I barely made it to the toilet before I was sick, when it was over I walked over the my linen closet to get a clean washcloth when I saw them, a box of tampons that were unopened._

_I closed my eyes and cursed out loud._

_***End Flashback***_

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AN: So I am dying to know your thoughts…please review.

**I am debating as to do EPOV flashback as a chapter, what do you want.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight**

**This Chapter is dedicated to pmvb11, my fellow insomniac!! Thanks for always cheering me on!!**

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Chapter 2

**EPOV**

I sat in my old room, trying to do anything but go down memory lane, but every time I closed my eyes I saw hers, big chocolate brown and as beautiful as ever. I never thought that I was good enough for Bella and it was too late when I woke up and realized how much I had hurt her.

_***Flashback***_

"_Why don't you like Bella Edward, she hasn't done anything to you but you insist on making her miserable every time she comes over" my twin sister Alice as much as I love her was pushing her limit._

_I can't tell you what exactly I didn't like about Bella Swan; she just rubbed me the wrong way. She had moved into town, and she was beautiful with her Chesnutt brown hair long and curly, her big brown eyes that held a wonder of thoughts behind them._

_Of course my family loved her; even Rosalie who never likes anyone absolutely adored Bella, which meant that she was always here, which in turned annoyed me. I knew right away that she was different from Alice and Rose not that they were stupid in anyway but Bella was intelligent, and she impressed me with her knowledge of classic literature and music._

_Also she didn't throw herself at me like other girls did, but she still was around, and I fought myself about being attracted to her. After a while she started dating and I found that it was easier to be around her when she was taken._

_I struggled with depression and it was hard to not want to always be around Bella, the joy that she emitted into life was intoxicating but I didn't want to hurt her, and I was afraid that I would._

_Junior year we could actually be considered friends, and I felt at ease with her I loved to listen to her laugh and I could talk to her for hours._

_I was sitting in study hall when I met Kate, she was a whirl of energy and very pretty, she could hold a candle to Bella. She set in front of me and smiled at me as she turned around and started talking to me, she was easy to talk to and be myself around, and I felt drawn to her the more we talked the more I wanted to._

_I felt like I could be with her and not am afraid of hurting her, so I went with it, and it was better then I thought, we were going out on Saturday and everything seemed great until Friday night._

_Movie night, we did this every Friday in the winter I walked in tonight not surprise to see Emmett, Rose, Jasper and Alice already engrossed in each other in the front seats, I sat down next to Bella who looked amazing as ever, angelic in the dim lights,_

"_Interview with a Vampire" great Alice must have picked this, it was a movie that was long, I tried to keep my eyes on the movie and not on Bella, but she was so close I could hear her breathing. She changed positions folding a leg under her and bringing her hand down next to it, without thinking I picked in up in mine and laced my fingers with her, I was as shocked as she was, she didn't look at me, she just sat there letting me rub her soft hand in mine._

_I leaned in closer to her and she followed suit as she put her head on my shoulder I got a whiff of her she smelled like strawberries and something else, something familiar. I don't know why I did it, but I leaned in and kissed her forehead, my lips lingering there for what seemed like ever. If she tilted her head up to me I would have kissed her plump red lips, but she didn't and I didn't want to push her._

_We separated before the movie ended, and I knew that what happened wasn't good, I had a date tomorrow and it would crush Bella when she found out, but better now then later. She searched for me before going into Alice's room, I met her eyes but looked away quickly._

_I picked Kat up first thing in the morning. Her red hair was long and straight and she had beautiful hazel eyes, I felt so drawn to her, as we were sitting in my living room she was half on my lap and we were kissing and talking, I was never into PDA with my other girlfriends but with Kate I wanted to kiss her and hold her._

_I didn't realize that the door had opened until I saw a whirl of brown fly up the stairs, Bella had seen us and she was hurting, Alice and Rose walked by very mad at me, and I knew that I was in for it later._

_I didn't see Bella and the girls all day, when Jasper and Emmett had come back from hiking, I didn't like the looks I received from them either, was everyone going to have a problem with Kate._

_We went to eat dinner, and I sat Kate next to me. _

"_Edward, ummm nevermind" my mother said to me, looking worried as she saw where Kate was, then it hit me, this had been Bella's seat for 3 years, but I couldn't sit Kate at the far end of the table, now could I._

_The rest of the group came in, and I was highly aware of the looks that passed between my family as Bella took the seat at the end of the table, far away from everyone else. This hurt her, and I knew it but this was how it had to be._

_My dad made his entrance in from the working at the hospital, and he took a double take at Kate sitting next to me and then glanced worried at Bella sitting by herself, my family needed to snap out of this right now._

"_Dad, this is my girlfriend Kate" I said feeling the whole energy of the room tense up, and while they made small talk, no one tried to get to know Kate at all._

_Bella left shortly after and I know that Kate smiled a little as she watched her leave._

_Kate didn't like Bella and my family didn't like Kate, it wasn't an even match at all._

_***End Flashback***_

I was snapped out of my memories by my phone ringing.

_Well I got me a fine wife I got me a fiddle  
When the suns comin up I got cakes on the griddle  
Life aint nothin but a funy funny riddle  
Thank God Im a country boy_

Emmett, laughing and reminding myself that it was time to re-do everyone's ringtones, I had let them pick there own.

"Hey Bro" I said happy for the Bella-Break.

"How's it hanging" Gotta love Emmett, he was finishing up Medical School going into Pediatrics.

"Guess who walked into me the other day, literally" I said.

"Jessica Stanley" he laughed.

"Not funny, Bella" he stopped laughing.

"She's back in town," his tone was seriously off.

"Yes, I don't know for how long, Charlie got hurt and Renee I guess asked Bella to come home" I said as I flipped over the book I was holding it was Bella's first novel, I owned them both and had read them too many times.

"Well" that's all he said was well.

I heard Rose in the background, she had gotten her degree in Psychology and they had gotten married 3 years ago.

"Who's back in Forks Baby" she asked.

"Bella" he said and I heard her say something I couldn't make out.

"What is that about Emmett, did Rose know Bella was coming home?" I was sure she did, I knew that Alice and Bella didn't talk much but Rose had never answered whenever anyone asked her.

"Uh, no" he said and then said he had to go.

That was frustrating, more then I could figure out why it bothered me if they had kept in touch.

But then again why would they tell me anything about Bella, I think my family still hasn't forgiven me for the way I treated her.

_***Flashback***_

_Kate and I had broken up and Bella had been over the house a lot and I was once again drawn to her, but she wouldn't give me the time of day. Not that I blamed her, Kate and I broke up a lot, we would have a heated argument and then end things, only to get back together days or a week later._

_This time we had been broken up for 3 weeks and she was seeing flipping Mike Newton and it was making me crazy, first he dated Bella, and now Kate._

_I was happy when Bella finally gave me a chance, and agreed to go to dinner with me, it was wonderful, and she was wonderful. Things escalated quickly from there, we had made out several times, but never going past a certain point, Bella wasn't comfortable going to that level yet._

_We spend our time reading Bronte and Austen, Bella was my equal I knew that and 3 months had passed by, and I was pulling back from her, not wanting to get any closer to her, because I knew that I would hurt her in the end. I knew that she could tell what was happening, but I also knew that she loved me and it killed me to do what I was going to do to her._

"_Edward, your so quiet anymore, please I know you have something to say so please just say it." She pleaded her brown eyes searching mine_

"_Bella, I care for you but I still have feelings for Kate" it was partially true Kate was my safety net, and I did care for her a lot but nothing compared to Bella._

_It broke my heart to watch her run in the house, I drove to Kate's her and Mike had broken up._

"_Hey Sexy, Glad to see that you came to your senses" she said pulling me too her, and doing her best to erase Bella from my mind, when we were finished she had succeeded but it was only temporary._

_I went home and faced the firing squad._

"_How could you, you asshole" Alice roared at me, I thought that Jasper was coming to get her but instead he came at me._

"_You led her on for months, she fucking loves you Edward and you broke her heart, and went back to Kate, are you really that mental" I had never seen Jasper so mad, and I could feel the tension rolling off of Emmett and Rose, but Esme got to me first and I was terrified, my mother never yelled._

"_Edward, I am seriously disappointed in you, Jasper is right Bella loves you, and you always hurt her, you string her along and then you hurt her, but this time son, you crossed a line" she said and I knew she was right._

"_Son," my father was in on this too, this wasn't going to be pretty. "We love Bella, and she is welcome in this house 24/7 and if Kate's presence here makes her uncomfortable then we choose Bella"_

"_So Kate's not welcome here, that's how it's going to be" I was mad but not for the right reason's._

"_She can be here, as long as its okay with Bella, if she upsets her then she will leave" Esme reinforced Carlisle's statement, I stomped off to my room._

_The next morning, I heard Bella come in, and I heard Emmett stop her, and I heard her leave._

"_A day of Peace and Quiet" Kate said loud enough for Emmett to hear._

_He ignored her, but she just kept on cutting Bella down until I drug her outside._

"_What, I'm just supposed to sit back and be ok that the girl you moon over and dated while we were a part is here every waking hour, because I don't fucking think so Edward, if you love me then you'll fix this" she whined._

"_Kate hun, my parents have made it clear that Bella is welcome here, and if we have a problem with that, then we can leave" I said._

"_Fine then let's go Edward" and we did leave, we spent a lot of time a her house from that moment on._

_Much to my surprise a week or so later when I walked in from Kate's house I was met by a strange guy, who looked my age but was a big as Emmett, I knew he was from the reservation._

"_Jake, man let's go the girls are going to skin us alive if we make them wait any longer" Emmett said I grabbed his arm after Jake had left,_

"_Who is that?"_

"_That is Jacob Black, he is Bella's boyfriend, and don't even try to mess with them or else you will deal with me baby brother" Emmett said and he was serious. I went up to my room slamming the door._

_It seemed like every time I was home, Bella and Jacob were here, and Jacob did not like me, hell I didn't like me for what I did to Bella._

_Summer came and went and we had to say good bye to Rose, Jasper and Emmett, mom had requested that only family be present for the going away dinner._

"_Oh really Edward, just family so I guess that includes her" Kate spat at me, I didn't know if Bella would be there or not, but Kate was mad and I dreaded telling her that she couldn't come._

"_I doubt it hun, mom said just family" I tried to soothe her, but it wasn't working._

"_If she's there then I will leave" I said, and that worked, she smiled a happy smile at me and I left to go to dinner._

_Bella was there, and it angered me because I knew that Kate was going to flip if she found out._

"_Just family huh" I spat as I sat down at the table._

"_Bella is family, and Rose, Jasper and I requested that she be here" Emmett said and made it clear that I was to stop it right now._

_After I ate dinner, I said goodbye and left, I could just tell Kate that Bella had come over later and I left, she didn't need to know the truth._

"_Good, I hope they all got the point that you are with me and that you will never be with her again" Kate's hatred of Bella was astounding but she knew that I had loved Bella._

_Senior year was flying by, and Kate was doing everything she could to keep me around, she knew that I had been accepted to Harvard, she didn't have the grades or the funds to go there, so it was her goal to keep me here._

_I ended things with her, telling her that a long distance relationship would never work. She didn't take it well and was calling me all day, every day. _

_I had heard that Bella and Jacob had also parted ways and I was excited to see her hanging around my house again as she was spending as much time with Alice as she could._

_They had left to go to Tyler's party, and I was surprised when Alice called saying they weren't drunk but to tipsy to feel like driving. I went over and picked them up, I took Alice home first I wanted to talk to Bella._

_I pulled over to a side road and parked the car, it was now or never._

"_Bella, I need to talk to you" she looked like she was afraid of what was coming. _

"_Yes, Edward" her voice trembled.._

"_I miss you Bella, I miss you so much, and when Alice told me that you and Jacob had broken up I didn't realize how happy the news made me, what does that mean Bella" _

"_I can't tell you what you feel Edward"_

"_Can you tell me how you feel" I asked. _

"_Why should I Edward, you always do this to me and still after everything you want me to tell you that I love you" She loved me, I already knew this but it felt good to hear that she still loved me even after all this time._

"_Do you love me Bella?" _

"_What if I did Edward, it doesn't change anything you and Kate are a couple" I knew that she knew we were broken up._

"_It would matter a lot, and you know that we aren't together anymore, it won't work with me heading to Harvard and she is going to Seattle" I said._

"_I do love you Edward, but I can't get hurt by you again" she was afraid._

_I leaned over and kissed her and she kissed me back I pulled us both back into the back seat, whispering my love for her in her ear. Our kisses became more urgent, and so did we, before I knew it I was inside of her, this wasn't how it was supposed to be, the back seat of my car but part of me didn't care, I was with her, and she was with me._

_I held her the whole way home, watching her walk into her house, as I headed home my phone rang._

_I was Cryin' when I met you  
Now I'm tryin' to forget you  
Your love is sweet misery  
I was Cryin' just to get you  
Now I'm dyin' 'cause I let you  
Do what you do down on me_

_Kate_

_I answered it, hoping for the last time to end this and try to make things work with Bella._

"_Yes Kate" I answered._

"_Bout time you answered I have been trying to get a hold of you for days Edward" she snapped._

"_Well you've got me, now talk"_

"_I need to talk to you in person, I can't say this over the phone, can you come in the morning"_

"_Yes, but I have to be at the school by 2 for graduation" I said. _

"_That's fine"_

_I went home thinking of Bella, my clothes smelled like her, my t-shirt had her scent on it._

_I left my house promising to meet everyone at the school and headed to Kate's._

"_Edward" she purred as she opened the door._

"_What do we need to talk about" I wanted her to know that this wasn't a social call._

"_Edward, I can imagine that in my absence you've done what you always do and ran to Bella, and while I hate to burst your Bella-Bubble right now, I just want you to know that my period is late"_

_Oh Shit. Goodbye Harvard, Goodbye Bella, Goodbye Life._

"_Have you bought a test" my dad was a Dr, I knew a thing or two._

"_Not yet, but I want you to be with me while I do it, after graduation"_

"_Why not now Kate" we could get this over with in no time._

"_Because you need to be at the school in a half hour and I'm not ready yet." We were playing her game now._

_She rode to graduation with me, we got there just in time for me to line up. I sat next to Alice of course and she started in on me right away._

"_What happened with you and Bella last night"_

"_None of your business" _

"_Did I see you arrive with Kate, are you going to hurt Bella again"_

_She growled at me as I looked at her, I was and she knew it, because I knew it. When Bella saw me with Kate after what happened between us last night she would never speak to me again._

_Graduation ended, and I hung back watching my family from a distance until mom spotted me and motioned me over for a picture, Kate came with me, and I watched as Bella's heart broke at the site of Kate and I together._

_Bella ran after pictures and I left with Kate, to go buy a test. However my parents interceded and insisted that we have dinner and when Rose and Alice joined us their anger only seemed to make Kate happier._

_By the time dinner was over Kate had to go home, and after I dropped her off I went to Bella's._

_I ran her doorbell for ten minutes until she opened it, her hair was everywhere, her was face was a mess and her eyes were empty, I had done this to her, I had broken her heart again. She tried shutting the door but I caught it._

"_Bella please let me explain" I begged from my porch_

"_Explain what Edward, every time I turn around you are constantly saying things you shouldn't say to me, and once again you played with my emotions" she was going to cry._

"_I didn't mean for that to happen last night," I had fought for years to keep from hurting her and I did it any ways, this was the time to just finish it once and for all, end her pain, she would go on with her life, she was leaving soon anyways._

"_Why Edward, why are you back with her" _

"_Because I love her" Because she says she thinks she's pregnant, and I don't want to hurt you more if she is. I lied to her._

"_You said you loved me too" she cried._

"_I do Bella, honestly I do but Kate and I have been together for a while now and I owe it to her to be with her" I was making stuff up._

"_I never want to see you again Edward, never" she yelled and slammed the door this time I didn't stop it._

_I got back in my car and headed home, ready to face the firing squad and they came at me full force, Alice hated me, Rose wanted to kill me, Emmett and Jasper were to disgusted to even talk to me and my parents just shook their heads and walked away._

_Kate wasn't pregnant and that was my wake up call to stop all contact with her at once, but it was hard, Bella was leaving my family hated me, and she was the only one who would talk to me._

_Alice cried when it was time for Bella to leave, They were all sad to see her go, I felt relief that I wouldn't have to see her sad anymore, she would go to college begin a new life, one that I would have no part of._

_***End Flashback***_

No part of until she came crashing back into my life literally.

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AN: Emmett's Ringtone is "Thank God I'm a Country Boy, By John Denver" and Kate's is "Cryin by Aerosmith"

Edward's Character is a bit complicated, I haven't quite felt him out all the way yet, and Bella won't be jumping right into his arms, there will be a little drama first.

**So what do you think!!**

**REVIEW!!!!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you to everyone who has reviewed, if you are reading and haven't reviewed yet, please do, reviews make me happy.**

**Back to Bella…**

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Chapter 3

Renee was teaching Kindergarten so it was just Charlie and me at the house during the day; we had talked a lot since my return home. We were watching and old war movie when the subject of Sydney came up.

"So Bells, is there a chance I might get to see my beautiful granddaughter while your in town?" Charlie asked.

He knew my reasons for keep in her away; he knew that I couldn't go back to the way things were before I had left. But he loved Sydney very much and was aching to spoil her some more.

"Jared called yesterday and said that she's been asking to come to me, it hurt him but he knows how set she can be on things and wants her to be happy, so yes you will get to see her before I leave Dad" I smiled at him.

"When did Edward come back Dad"

"Well from what Carlisle said, he came back to do some of his internship I think it's called, he's only been back maybe a month" Charlie didn't want to discuss Edward.

"When did you see him" he asked.

"The other evening at Neely's Store" I said "We spoke very briefly and then he got called to the hospital"

Charlie opened his mouth to say something, but closed it and went back to watching his movie, my mind however drifted back.

_***Flashback***_

_I stared down in shock at the results of the test, according to it I was pregnant and my country song of a life just added another lyric about it being my one and only time._

_I pulled out the phone book and found a Dr, I called to make an appointment, I would go in for a blood test and when the results came back an appointment would be scheduled._

_I headed to class, hoping that I could make it through the day, the nausea had went away and I grabbed a muffin on my way there. _

_The teacher was talking about how writer's use life experiences to make stories their own, my life wasn't a story right now it was a soap opera. Some how I made it to the next morning, Friday's were a free day and I headed over to have the test done._

_I hated blood, the site and smell made me even more nauseous then I already was. But the lab tech was quick and it was over before I knew it, now I just had to wait._

_It was a hot but beautiful August Arizona day, so I decided to enjoy it driving around hitting some of the local spots getting a feel for my new home._

_My phone rang, I had hoped it would be the lab but then I heard the song._

_As we go on  
We remember  
All the times we  
Had together  
And as our lives change  
Come Whatever  
We will still be  
Friends Forever_

_Alice was calling me, oh how I missed her._

"_Hey Ali" I tried to sound as happy as possible._

"_Bells" she chirped, "I miss you so much"_

"_Me too Ali, it's not the same without you" it was the truth Alice was like a sister to me, and I was carrying her niece or nephew but that wasn't something that I felt I could share at the time._

"_How's school" she asked._

"_It's good, I love it here the sun shines warm and the classes are wonderful" it was the truth. "When do you leave Al?" _

"_Monday, Mom is a mess her babies are going off to school" _

"_Tell her I miss her" I did miss my family._

"_So have you met anyone special there" Alice always trying to know the latest gossip._

"_I haven't but I have a lot going on right now so it hasn't been a top priority" once again the truth but not the whole truth._

_We finished our talk and I was homesick by the time we hung up, so I threw myself back into Arizona discovery when my phone rang again, this time the default generic ring._

"_Hello"_

"_Hello is this Bella" a warm voice asked._

"_Yes, this is she"_

"_Bella, this is Dr. Waterman's office calling you back with your lab work, your Beta came back positive" she stated._

"_So that mean's I'm pregnant" I asked._

"_Yes, dear congratulations, Dr. Waterman would like to see you next Friday to start running some tests, and make sure that everything is going smoothly can you come in at 9am"_

"_Yes" she rattled off some stuff I needed to do and then I was left alone again to think about it all._

_Picking my phone up, I called my mom dreading this conversation but she would have to know._

"_Bella Sweetheart how are you, oh I miss you so much" she started off._

"_I'm ok mom" my mom had known about how everything ended with Edward, I had left out the sex part, but she had gotten the general idea I think._

"_What's wrong Bella" _

"_I'm just going to come right out and say it mom, I'm pregnant" I held my breath and waited for the shouting._

"_I thought you were going to tell me you didn't want to go to school anymore, not that your news isn't shocking dear" this was confusing, not the response one expects._

"_Did you hear me tell you that I was pregnant mom?"_

"_Yes dear I did, Edward?"_

"_Yep"_

"_Are you going to tell him?" Shit I hadn't decided that._

"_I want to, but he has made my life Hell mom, and this isn't helping either" I cried._

_She comforted me as best as she could on the phone._

"_You need to try Bella, call him and give him a chance" she said._

"_Ok I will mom"_

_Then we discussed my appointment coming up and other school stuff, I promised to call her and let her know what the Dr said on Friday._

_I headed back to my little apartment, it was small but nice 5 minutes from Campus it had 2 small bedrooms one mine and the other I had planned to use as a study area, but now would be the nursery._

_As much as I wasn't prepared for this, it was happening and placing my hand on my belly I spoke to my baby for the first time._

"_I know its not much now Peanut, but your room will be amazing by the time you get here, Momma loves you very much" and I did, it was happening and I was embracing it._

_I tinkered around all day, working on final assignments, my summer course was ending and Fall would start up in a few weeks, I looked on the school website I could take a lot of online courses if I needed to a later date, that helped. My Grandma had passed away and left me her only grandchild her estate it wasn't large but it was enough that I wouldn't have to work while I went to school, something that helped even more now._

_I debated about calling Edward for days, I knew he would be leaving soon for Harvard and I needed to tell him,_

_Thursday night I broke down and dialed his number, waiting to hear his smooth velvet voice, I could picture him in my head clear as could be his messy bronze hair and piercing green eyes. But the voice that answered was far from smooth._

"_Hello" Kate said _

"_May I speak to Edward please" I asked trying to remain calm._

"_He isn't available right now, can I take a message" she was loving this._

"_This is Bella, and it is important that I speak with him, can you please have him call me"_

"_He doesn't want to speak to you, when are you going to realize that he is with me, he is in love with me, not you" she snapped._

"_Just please have him call me" I said and hung up, I couldn't fight the tears anymore they came in a downpour of emotions._

_What did I expect honestly, to tell him I was pregnant and for him to come flying out here and hold my hand, he was with Kate and nothing had changed._

_I was alone, and would do this alone. _

_Friday morning I was drinking my second bottle of water as I entered Dr. Waterman's cheery receptions area._

_I was sitting in the exam room, taking deep calming breathes, wishing that I could be any where but here, when someone knocked on the door._

_Dr. Waterman was in her early 40's and had a very comforting feel about her, we talked as she examined me, I explained the situation when she asked about the father._

"_The most important thing to remember Bella is you and your baby, you don't want to stress yourself out to much, its not healthy" she said in a calm voice that made me feel better._

_By my last menstrual period and the fact that I knew when the conception happened I was going into my second trimester and my due date was February 27__th__. _

_I explained why it never occurred to me the possibly that I was pregnant, mainly I explained it to myself, the stress of my leaving, plus coming here to school I didn't even realize that I had skipped 2 periods, my life had been a blur._

_I was almost 8 weeks along, She wheeled a cart over and there on the ultrasound screen I saw my peanut, it was small but you could make out the things as the Dr. showed me, she printed out some pictures and gave me bag of stuff to look over and read._

_I made my next appointment and left there with a new sense of myself. _

_I battled with myself on trying to call Edward again, and I finally broke down and called him in October I was almost 20 weeks along and definitely showing. I dialed the number my hands shaking; it went straight to voicemail so I left a message._

"_Edward, its Bella um I need to speak with you, can you please call me back, thanks bye"_

_I called him as I was waiting for the Dr to come in and do the big ultrasound, I could know the sex of the baby if I wanted to and I had decided that I did want to know._

"_Congratulations Bella, it's a Girl" the Dr said and I was excited a little girl, my little girl._

_I waited, but no phone call ever came. I didn't go home for Thanksgiving, Charlie and Renee came to me, Charlie had a hard time not going to Edward personally when he heard but I explained that I had tried to contact him and if he wanted to speak to me he would call me back._

_I wasn't going home for Christmas either, I was finishing up some Christmas shopping when my world turned upside down._

"_Bella" I heard an all too familiar voice call to me, I was blocked by the clothing rack so my head was all that could be seen._

_My heart leapt though, looking straight at me was Rose. _

"_What are you doing here Rose" I asked shocked, wishing I could hide my belly._

"_I am in town to see family, I have missed you Bella" she said coming closer, I moved around the rack trying to stay out of sight. She noticed me do so and moved quicker then I could, her hand flying to her mouth as she me in my state of hugeness. _

"_Bella, oh my god you're pregnant" she said a little louder then needed._

_I just nodded, wanting to run but that was impossible at this moment._

"_Come on, we are going to lunch and you are going to tell me everything" she said, and I did, at a little café in the mall, I poured my heart out to my best friend._

"_I have called him and he won't return my calls, so I am doing this on my own" I said to her._

"_Bella, can you do this on your own, Carlisle and Esme would be thrilled to help as would the rest of us, have you thought about telling them?" _

"_I think about it all the time Rose, but its just not an option, Edward wants nothing to do with me and he has made that clear, now this is my body and my baby and I am not going to go down that path that Edward took me down before with him coming in and out of my life whenever it pleased him, not caring about the destruction that it caused me" tears were flowing._

"_Ok, Bella this is your decision and I will keep it a secret but you need to really think long and hard about this, we are family and we love you" she said._

_Rose and I spent the next couple of days together, we shopped for the nursery and she enjoyed picking out all the girly pink stuff with me. I was sad when she headed home to Forks, she promised to not tell Edward._

_She called me the day after Christmas and while I had hoped that she was calling with good news her news only confirmed what I had feared._

"_I tried talking to him, don't worry I wasn't going to tell him, but Kate wouldn't leave his side," she said._

_He was still with Kate; well I guess their long distance relationship was working after all._

"_I'm sorry Bella," she said._

"_It's ok Rose, you just confirmed what I already knew" _

"_Bella, I told Emmett," she said and I almost lost it._

"_Rose, you promised" _

"_I had to, he knew something was up, he won't tell he promised me and he's going to be a Dr. so he's worried about you, he has always thought of you as his little sister, he loves you" her words made me cry. "Please don't cry Bells, I'm sorry"_

"_It's not that Rose, I just miss you all so much, you, Emmett, Jasper and Alice" I cried._

_We talked for a while longer; she said that she was going to try Edward again before she left. But her next calls had no better news. He had actually told her that if he wanted to speak to me then he would call me back, when she had asked him why he wasn't returning my calls._

_My due date was coming closer, and my new girlfriends from school Anna, Michelle and Sarah had thrown me a shower and I was happy to not be totally alone here. _

_February came and my mom called to tell me that she was coming to stay with me for a while after the baby was born so that she could help me. I also received weekly calls from Rose and Emmett who were still abiding by my wishes._

_I remember the day that Sydney came into the world, it was 2 days before my due date the 25__th__ when my water broke, mom rushed me to the hospital, and I remembered the pain being there but truly forgot it when they placed my beautiful baby in my arms after 12 hours of labor._

_Sydney Sophia Swan-Cullen, 21 inches long weighting in at 7 pounds 5 ounces a true beauty, Mom sent pictures to Rose who called immediately with Emmett cheering in the background about his niece._

_She was my true joy, Mom stayed for a few weeks to help me get settled, and I was taking online courses and looking into day cares near the school so that I could start regular classes too._

_Sydney was perfect, she hardly ever cried she was content and happy she smiled and cooed and played and made me happy every time I looked at her._

_It was the day that Alice called when my bubble burst._

"_Hey Bells" she chirped _

"_Alice how's Italy" I asked I missed her and I knew that she would be upset with me when she knew my secret._

"_Italy is lovely but I think you know why I am calling" her tone a bit harsher now._

"_Ali, I" I started but she cut me off._

"_I know that you have tried to tell him, Rose told Jasper everything when he saw the pictures and she explained it all to me too, but why Bella, why couldn't you tell me, I would have kept your secret too," she cried._

"_Alice I was scared, still am scared about the whole thing, every time that I tried to call him and he didn't answer was another heartbreaking event for me, with him at the cause, as for not telling you, I am truly sorry Rose found out by accident, I am not purposefully keeping you out, but I don't want Edward to know about Sydney it's too late, if he hears about her, he and Kate will be here before I know it, and they will turn my life upside down Alice, and you know they will" I pleaded._

"_I'm still not happy that you kept this from me Bella, but I will go along with it for now, I tried to call Edward to and he told me the same thing he told Rose about leaving him be and leaving you be" she said sadly._

"_Alice, if your brother had any feelings for me at all, even as a friend he would have returned my many phone calls, its just not going to happen" I said._

"_Will you tell mom and dad" she asked._

"_Wow Alice that's a tough one, they would never keep this from Edward" I said._

"_Bella if you requested it, they would. They know how he has hurt you, please consider" after I promised that I would, I had to sit there and think how it would actually work his whole family knowing that there was a child but not telling him._

_I picked Sydney up and took her home, and decided that one last time, I would call him._

_I was torn between hoping he would answer and hoping he wouldn't, until he did._

"_Hello" his voice was liquid velvet and it tore my heart out._

"_Ed-Edward" I choked out._

"_Bella," at first he sounded sincere then his next words rocked me "Isn't it enough to make me tell my family repeatedly that I don't want to talk to you, but now to have to tell you as well"_

"_Edward just listen for a minute please, I need to explain something to you" I begged._

"_Bella, I can't do this I don't want to know, what ever it is just please stop calling me, and stop hounding my family to call me for you," he said before hanging up._

"_Ok Sydney Daddy has made his decision, now we need to forget about him and move on with our lives" I said rocking her sleeping body back and forth._

_I went home briefly for Summer Break, I had spoken to Rose and she said that Edward wasn't coming home; he barely spoke to his family anymore._

_I dialed the familiar number and the warm voice answered the phone._

"_Esme" I said tears coming already._

"_Bella dear how are you, are you home" she asked._

"_Yes, just briefly but I was wondering if we could talk. Can I come over?"_

"_Yes Bella, anytime"_

_I packed up my daughter and headed the route that I had driven so often, pulling into the driveway and parking my car._

_Unhooking the carrier I headed for the door to the home I loved to be in, taking a deep breath before ringing the bell, Esme answered her smiling face warm with love, until she looked down and confusion spread._

"_Come in Bella" she said._

"_Esme, this is a shock I know but I would like you to hear me out" I begged._

_I told her the whole story, the night before graduation, graduation day, my leaving and the millions of times that I tried to tell Edward but him not wanting to know._

"_Why didn't you call us Bella, we would have helped you" she said her eyes sad._

"_I wanted to but I was scared, after trying Edward so many times I became afraid that if you knew and you told him, he would come back into my life and hurt me again just like I let him do for years. I know he and Kate are still together and he told me just a few days ago when I spoke to him finally that he doesn't want to know anything about my life and to stop involving his family in it"_

"_Who knows" she caught on the last bit._

"_Rose ran into me in December and well it was quite obvious she begged to tell, and even tried to talk to him while she was here but he wouldn't listen to her, then Alice found out after seeing a picture, you have every right to be upset with me,"_

"_Well I can't say that I am not, but the situation isn't the best Bella, we have loved you like a daughter and it tore us apart to see you hurt by our son, when you left a piece of us left too, but this is something that I never expected to happen" she gestured to the carrier._

"_I didn't want to keep it from you any longer, but I can't say that I am not scared to know that he will know now and what is going to happen" I said truthfully._

"_Bella, my son has already informed us that he wants nothing to do with your life now, and he is so wrapped up in Kate and whatever game it is they play with each other that he barely speaks to us." Esme was in tears now._

"_Bella" the voice behind me scared me because I hadn't realized that Carlisle was home._

_Oh Shit, I thought to myself, closing my eyes I heard him take a seat. I opened my eyes and looked at him._

"_We informed Edward a while ago that we loved you as a daughter and that we would never cut you out of our lives, while it would pain me to keep this kind of a secret from him, Esme is right he will not speak to us about anything that has to do with you" Carlisle look was a sad as Esme's this family was hurting and I hated to hurt them more._

"_So are you telling me that you won't tell him about Sydney, unless I get to tell him first, if he decides he wants to know about me and my life" I asked I had to know._

"_It will hurt to keep it from him, but I think right now, until he gets his life straightened out and a certain person out of it, it would be for the best for you and for our granddaughter" Esme choked up on granddaughter._

_Sydney stirred under her cover, and I opened it, revealing her to her grandparents for the first time. I picked her up and handed her to Esme who instantly loved her, and she and Carlisle just fussed over her._

_There was no doubting that she was Edwards's child, her hair was his bronze color and she had his emerald green eyes. She cooed and smiled at them, and they held her and loved her for hours. I hated to leave with her, but it was getting dark._

"_Will you bring her back again tomorrow" Esme asked._

"_Of course, and you are welcome to be as big of a part of her life as you would like to be" I said._

"_We will figure something out that works well for everyone and pray that Edward comes back to his family" she said as she and Carlisle kissed Sydney and I goodbye._

_The rest of my visit went like that, and I left for Arizona 2 weeks later feeling better about Sydney's family knowing about her, they had all agreed to keep her secret until Edward was ready to know._

_***End Flashback***_

The Cullen's loved Sydney, how Edward had never found about her after all these years, I didn't know, he never once called me to speak to me even after I knew that Kate was out of his life for good.

Even after 6 years, I knew from Rose and Alice that Edward did not speak to them about me, so the secret carried on over time.

Esme and Carlisle came to visit her often and it was always hard to watch them leave, my daughter deserved to be with the families that loved her.

I answered Jared's call the minute that it rang.

"Bells, she wants to be with you I am going to bring her is that ok"

"Yeah I can meet you half way"

My daughter was coming home to Forks, the place when her father was, and I wasn't sure how this was going to go over.

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AN: Sydney's coming home…The Cullen's kept Bella's secret but that is all going to change now.

**Next Chapter will be Edwards and then the present will catch up to the, in Chapter 5, well that the plan for now, but we all know how that goes!!!**

**Please Review, it makes me write faster!!!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer…I do not own twilight.**

**I decided to post this chapter early...I hope that you like it!!! if you do please review.**

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Chapter 4

Edward

My days continued the same as they had before running into Bella, but now the problem was she was constantly on my mind, in my thoughts and in my dreams.

I walked through my parents home marveling to myself about the chances of seeing her again, she didn't seem angry with me even after all the hell I put her through, she went out of her way to be nice actually by bringing me the stuff I had left at the store.

It took all the strength I had not to go running back to her and profess the love that had never left, but I didn't want to hurt her more, I didn't know if I could ever have a relationship with Bella, the past still coming through as time after I time I choose someone else over her, even though the love wasn't there with Kate she was my match as messed up as I was.

I had stayed with her to keep the temptation of running to Bella, I had to get my life in order, and slowly over the years the depression I suffered lessened and I was able to end things with Kate.

"Edward," I stiffened the voice behind me all to familiar.

"Jessica, how are you today"

"I'll be even better when you take me to dinner later" she said putting her hand on my arm.

"Can't sorry, I have plans" I said rushing off, there was no way I was going down that road again, I had only dated briefly since ending things with Kate but I was hesitant about getting involved again.

Kate…I shook my head think about how messed up things were.

_***Flashback***_

_When the test was negative I could read the disappointment all over her face. It made her cling harder to me, she was a different person after Bella left Forks._

_She was the Kate that I remembered meeting and liking, and her new found happiness was nice to be around, we spent the remainder of our summer together. We were in my room packing my stuff up for school and I needed another box, I heard a phone ringing but couldn't make out who it was I walked in though and knew immediately._

"_Hello" Kate said _

_I waited and listened to what would come next._

"_He isn't available right now, can I take a message" Kate's tone was amused.._

"_He doesn't want to speak to you, when are you going to realize that he is with me, he is in love with me, not you" she snapped at Bella, part of me wanted to run in and grab the phone, but instead I just waited and went in a few minutes later, it was for the best._

_Medical School was hard, Emmett and Rose were there which was hard because I was constantly reminded of Bella by them, and had to keep telling them that I didn't want to speak to her, or about her._

_I was working hard, and had made some new friends, Kate called me every night and I listened as she babbled on about her days. A month at school at gone by and I was working on the mound of homework that I had when I heard it._

_Even the best fall down sometimes  
Even the stars refuse to shine  
Out of the dark you fall in time  
I somehow find  
You and I collide_

_Bella was calling me, I picked the phone up staring at it, why wouldn't' she just leave me be, she was better off with out me. I let it go to Voicemail but listened to it the minute it beeped_

_Her voice was pained but still a beautiful melody to my ears._

"_Edward, its Bella um I need to speak with you, can you please call me back, thanks bye"_

_I debated about calling her back, but in the end decided against it, too much history and too much pain there._

_Christmas vacation came with a reunion with Kate, it was good to see her, my family was not happy to see her though, nothing had changed. Rose and Emmett both tried to get me alone several times, something about talking to Bella._

_Kate got mad at them, and was going to ruin everyone's Christmas so I stepped in, "What Rosalie I said as she cornered me in the kitchen Christmas night. _

"_Why won't you speak to Bella when she calls you, you need to get over your self and call her" Rose just couldn't stay out of it._

"_Rose, if wanted to speak to her then I would call her back, for the last time leave it be" I snapped._

_We made it through vacation without another incident. But my family still wouldn't leave the situation be, they kept on me about talking to Bella, even Alice started in on me when we talked over spring break, I repeated the same words I had told Rose._

_I was trying to enjoy my break when it played again, she was calling me again._

_This time I answered I was being nice if she needed to hear it from me then so be it._

"_Hello" I answered hoping my resolve would hold out._

"_Ed-Edward" she was scared, that much was evident._

"_Bella," saying her name to her was so different then saying her name to anyone else, the memories of her came flooding back, I stopped myself and proceeded._

"_Isn't it enough to make me tell my family repeatedly that I don't want to talk to you, but now to have to tell you as well?" I was harsher then I wanted to be but she was better off without me, when she realized that, she would be happy._

"_Edward just listen for a minute please, I need to explain something to you" she begged._

"_Bella, I can't do this I don't want to know, what ever it is just please stop calling me, and stop hounding my family to call me for you," I said before hanging up._

_That was the last time I had spoken to Bella Swan, my life changed after that I broke up with Kate and decided to never go back that road again._

_I dated briefly but never anything serious. My family laid off about Bella, I wasn't sure if they were still talking to her or not, they never mentioned her._

_I was at home 2 years later when I saw it, a picture of a girl a toddler, she had bronze ringlet curls and beautiful smile and green eyes. Who was this child, a relative the resemblance was too much to not be._

_Esme caught me staring at the photo that had been sitting on the counter, I was drawn to this child she was more then beautiful even at such a young age._

"_Who is this," I asked my mom. She looked at me for a moment and then spoke._

"_Oh that is your cousin," she said quickly taking the photo and looking at it._

"_She is quite beautiful, how old is she, I have never heard of her before" I asked._

"_She just turned 2 in February" she answered and then left the room._

_My mother loved children, I knew she was aching for grandchildren, Emmett and Rose were getting married next year so hopefully they would have a few soon._

_I saw more pictures of the girl here and there, and got the same answers if I asked._

_***End Flashback***_

I wondered one day what my own children would look like, but that was a long way off.

**BPOV**

I met Jared, and we had an awkward dinner together. Sydney was going on about something when I thought about Jared.

_***Flashback***_

_Sydney was turning 2 and we were going to the park she loved to ride the Carousel, I was trying to hold onto her and all her stuff when I dropped her favorite bear, she let out a squeal and I was trying to pick it up, with two tan hands reached it first._

"_Thank you," I said to the smiling face._

"_Anytime Bella" Jared was in a lot of my classes and he was very handsome._

"_Can I take some of that stuff for you, I think you have your hands full as it is" he said taking the diaper bag and carrying it for me through park._

_We had hit it off and he was wonderful with Sydney, when I told him about Edward he understood my feelings after the roller coaster or emotions that I had been on._

_We were together for 3 years both working in publishing after college, my first book had come out and when we went to the launch party thrown by my publisher he proposed. I was very happy and content with life._

_But that soon faded, we grew distant as I worked on my second book, he had a bit of jealousy over the popularity of them, right before Sydney's 6__th__ birthday he ended our relationship, stating that he just didn't love me anymore, I saw it coming but the hurt was still there._

_He was doing his best to be a father figure for her, but it was easier when we were together for him to be one, he loved her but I knew that this arrangement wasn't working either, it pained me that my she was going to go through this,_

_***End Flashback***_

We were on our way back to Forks when she read the welcome sign.

"Forks, isn't that where Nana Ren and Pappy Charlie live and Nana Esme and Pappy Carlisle are too" my daughter was smart.

"Yes sweetheart they all live in Forks" I smiled back at her in her booster seat with her juice box.

"Does my Daddy live in Forks too?" that threw me; we didn't talk about Edward a lot.

Honesty with children, how honest to be.

"Yes Peanut your Daddy lives in Forks, do you want to meet him?" if she did I would figure something out.

"Not yet but can we go see Nana Esme?" she asked.

"I can call" I placed the Bluetooth piece in my ear and called Esme.

"Hello" her voice was warm as could be.

"Hello Esme its Bella"

"I heard you were in town, how is Charlie" she asked.

"He's getting better I think he is enjoying my company" I laughed.

"That's great dear"

"I was wondering if it was ok to visit you right now." I hoped Edward would be at the hospital.

"Yes, Carlisle will be here soon, Edward is working afternoon shift, but I do have another surprise for you" she knew that I wasn't wanting a run in with him.

"Ok I will see you in 10 minutes"

"Why didn't you tell Nana bout me momma" Sydney asked.

"Because I thought it would be nice to surprise her and pappy" but I wondered what her surprise was.

We pulled into the driveway and I was getting Sydney out of the car when the door opened and Esme squealed.

"Oh my there's my baby girl, look how big you are" and she wrapped Sydney in a big hug.

"Sydney-bear" I heard a booming voice call out and Emmett came running out to greet us, Rose right behind.

"Uncle Emie, Auntie Rose" Sydney was surrounded by her family and she was loving it.

We went into the house everyone making over her and how big she had gotten, she was telling stories to them and they gave her their undivided attention.

The door flew opened, I was scared for a moment until Sydney got up and ran yelling Pappy Carlisle. He swept her up in his arms covering her in kisses.

"Bella this is truly a great surprise" he said smiling at me.

"Pappy Carlisle, did you know that my Daddy lives in Forks too" out of the mouths of Babes.

They all turned and looked at me, "She put it together herself," I said.

"Oh Alice is going to be so excited when they arrive and see you" Esme told Sydney who was still hugging Carlisle.

This is what her life should have been like, she seen them all and as often as we could but never like this. It made me happy and sad.

"Auntie Ali and Uncle Jazz are coming too" she squealed sounding just like Alice that we all laughed.

"They called right before you did, and should be here any minute now, what do you say we surprise them" Esme said as Sydney nodded and the left the room.

We saw the lights coming up the long drive and heard Jasper complain about Alice's luggage as they came in.

"Bella" Alice squealed running towards me, "Mom said you were in town visiting Charlie, oh how I have missed you, I hope your brought pictures of my gorgeous niece and I have so many presents for you to take back to my favorite niece"

On cue Sydney jumped out and said "Aunt Ali, I'm your only niece"

Alice and Jasper both ran to her, and hugged her and kissed her. "You're still my favorite".

We stayed and talked and they played with Sydney. We were eating dinner when the subject was brought up again by Sydney.

"Aunt Ali, we are in Forks, did you know it rains here like all the time" she said and we all chuckled.

"How did you get so smart" Alice beamed.

"My mommy said that I get it from my Daddy that is smart too like momma, and that my Daddy lives in Forks too" she was eating her mashed potatoes talking like she was in her teens.

Once again the family all looked at me. "Are you going to tell Edward" Esme asked.

"Well Forks is a small town, he will know soon enough if I don't tell him, but I am trying to figure out how to say Oh yeah Edward remember all those times I tried talking to you and you wouldn't talk to me, I was trying to tell you that we have a daughter" yeah I could see that happening just like that.

"We are all here for you dear if you need us to help tell him" Esme said rubbing my arm.

I picked up my sleeping daughter, everyone giving the two of us hugs and kisses as we headed home, promising another visit tomorrow and a shopping trip with Alice and Rose over the weekend.

Charlie and Renee were just as excited to see Sydney when we got home, but it was way past bedtime so I put her to bed, going to sleep in my own bed, wondering just how to tell Edward.

**EPOV**

Dad left the hospital in a buzz of excitement, I knew that Emmett, Rose, Alice and Jasper were coming home today to visit for a while, but surely it didn't excite my father that much.

I headed home the night had drug on, there usually wasn't too much excitement in Forks, I walked in my house loud with talking, my family was in the kitchen all talking excitedly about something.

"Hello" I said, and my sister ran over and hugged me, Jasper and Emmett shook my hand and Rose gave me a smile.

I sat down and Esme brought me a plate and I ate my dinner marveling at how different the house felt, with everyone in it, it was home again, except one person was missing for it to truly be home, Bella.

I excused myself around midnight I was so tired, we would all catch up more tomorrow, I was off and looking forward to a day of relaxing.

I fell asleep dreaming my usual dreams of the life I could have had with Bella if I hadn't been so stupid all those years ago.

I awoke early and headed out before my family was up and moving and headed down to First Beach, it was going to be a nice summer day and I intended to enjoy it.

It was around 11 when I finished my hike and was back on the beach, a little girl was playing in the sand, I watched her building, her curls were fighting to get out from under her hat, and she had on cute little sunglasses.

Her ball rolled away in the wind and I took it over to her. She looked up and smiled at me.

"Thank You" she said, she had to be about 6 I was guessing.

"That's a really nice castle your building"

"I'm not supposed to talk to strangers" she said, smart child.

"My name is Edward, where is your mommy" I asked looking around.

"She walked right over there to get me an ice cream, if anyone bothers me I am to scream and run away" she said, she was a smart child.

"Can I ask your name" I asked her.

"Sydney, what was yours again?"

"Edward" I smiled sitting down next to her, but far enough away not to scare her.

"My Daddy's name is Edward" she said putting more sand in her bucket.

"That's cool," I said smiling, lucky guy.

Then I heard a gasp and the mother was coming back.

"Sydney Sophia Swan-Cullen what did I tell you about strangers" then she looked at me.

I looked between Bella and the girl playing in the sand, back and forth her hair was my hair but with Bella's curls.

"Sorry Momma, but his name is Edward, like Daddy's" she said to a shocked Bella.

"Oh" Bella said and she looked at me.

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**AN: Well they've met, sooner then Bella had expected but fate takes its own hand in things.**

**Bella's Ringtone is Howie Day's Collide.**

**chapter 5 is in the works I am looking over it deciding if I like it.**

**Please Review!!!! **


	5. Chapter 5

**You all know the disclaimer…**

**A big shout out to Patty (pmvb11) for helping be give Bella more back bone in this chapter.**

**Thanks to my repeat reviewers, you guys make my day: Edwards-a-beefcake, Mars32, mrsemmettcullen4ever, pmvb11, and swwetkyo!!!****

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Chapter 5

I took Sydney to First Beach it was a beautiful day, we were meeting the Cullen's later for a picnic.

She was playing in the sand and asked for an Ice Cream, I wasn't far from her, and she knew what to do if a stranger came up to her and scared her.

But to my surprise I turned around and sitting a few feet away from her was a man, and she was talking to him.

Fear came over me.

I gasped and ran up to them, not looking at the man.

"Sydney Sophia Swan-Cullen what did I tell you about strangers" then I looked at the man sitting next to her and my heart stopped.

Edward had heard her name, and was putting everything together, her bronze curls shining in the sunlight. I closed my eyes praying to wake up; it wasn't supposed to go like this,

"Sorry Momma, but his name is Edward, like Daddy's" she said to me.

"Oh" that's all I could get out.

"Bella, what is this" Edward asked.

I took a deep breath and sat down, handing Sydney her ice cream. He came over and sat on the towel next to me, looking at me intensely.

"Edward, this is your daughter Sydney" I said quietly I didn't want Sydney to hear all of this.

"How Bella, it only happened one time" he said shocked.

"Well Dr. Cullen you know that all it takes, I was a virgin that night we didn't use protection." I was blunt.

"Why didn't I know" he asked looking at her.

"Edward, I tried to tell you, I called you and asked you to call me back how many times, you never called, and then I finally got to speak to you and you made it quite clear that you wanted nothing to do with me" I said, seeing the remembrance flashing in his eyes.

"Why didn't you just say it in a voicemail" he asked, I looked at him like he was stupid.

"That's not something you just say to someone in a voicemail Edward, and after the way you had treated me I was scared of what you would do to our lives." Honesty that is what he was getting.

"Does she know about me or about her family" he asked.

"I never held back that you were her father, she has seen you in photos and your family has known about her all along Edward, just because you cut me out of your life they didn't" I said seeing the hurt cross his face.

"My family has kept the fact that I have a daughter from me for 6 years, Bella" he was starting to yell.

"Edward, you will lower your voice right now, and you will not yell in front of our daughter"

Our daughter, I had never said that before not even to Jared.

He looked at Sydney and then back at me "Sorry, but you need to understand that I am upset."

"Listen Edward and listen good! '....think! You are the only one at fault here. I tried to talk to you. Rose and Emmett tried to talk to you. Alice and Jasper tried to talk to you. You didn't want to listen. You went on your merry self-centered way and lived your life. I wasn't expecting anything. I didn't want anything from you. I thought it was only right that you should know but you took that away from yourself – .ELSE. You – the selfish you. After you said your last words, I knew you wanted nothing to do with me."

"So what happens now?" he asked the shock shown on his.

"What do you mean" I asked not wanting to think about what he might say.

"I mean I have a right to know my daughter Bella, I want to spend time with her" he said.

"I understand that, but there will be some guidelines, Edward"

"Such as" he snapped, I flinched.

EPOV

I had a daughter that Bella and my family had kept from me, I was burning inside, and remembering the pictures I would occasionally find of my "Cousin" it was my daughter all along.

I thought back to the many times Bella had called urgency in voice and I had deleted her messages and then the last time told her just to stop that I didn't want to speak to her ever again.

It was my fault that I didn't have a relationship with my daughter, but Bella and my family were not getting off that easy.

"I understand that, but there will be some guidelines, Edward" Bella said and I snapped back her. "Like what" she flinched, and I remember the pain I had caused her.

She had said that she was afraid if I knew that I would come into their lives and destroy our daughter as I had destroyed her. That was hard to hear.

"First Edward, do not give me that attitude. I never hid you from her. She knows who her daddy is – I never took that away from her. Secondly, if you are going to come into this with this attitude, then maybe I really have to think about you coming into Sydney's life. She is my first priority – and she will never suffer as I suffered with you!"

That stung. "Now if you have gotten off your high horse, I think that we need to ease her into this, both of us being around the first couple of times" she was being reasonable - I had no claims to my daughter we were never married.

"Ok, well what are your plans for today?"

Bella's face got redder and I forgot how beautiful she was when she blushed.

"We are having a Picnic, with Nana Esme, Pappy Carlisle, Uncle Emie, Auntie Rose, Auntie Ali and Uncle Jazz" my daughter said and it hit me again that my family had been a part of her life all along, I suppressed my anger and sadness again.

"Can I join your picnic" I asked Bella, but smiled as Sydney answered again.

"Mommy, can he please, please, please" she asked smiling a smile that I would never be able to say no to.

"Yes Peanut he can join us" she said and I helped pack up the stuff and followed them back to my parents house.

Bella placed Sydney in the car and she came to say something "Edward, any funny business, any attitude against your family and Sydney and I will leave. You got it!"

I just had to nod and swallow my pride.

This was going to be interesting to say the least, we climbed out of the cars, and I watched from behind as my family embraced Bella and my daughter, and saw the shock come across their faces as I came into the backyard.

"He knows" Bella said calming them down. They went back to whatever it was they were doing and I grabbed Bella's arm.

"Since we have some time, we need to talk" and I took her to dad's study. Then surprinsgly, Bella replied "Edward, just because I am considered you entering Sydney's life doesn't mean you can touch me. I appreciate you don't do that again." I really must have hurt her badly.

We sat down and I started with the question in my head.

"When was she born" simple enough to start with but I felt like an ass for not knowing.

"February 25th"

"She knows about me, why does she think that I am not in her life"

"Well half the kids in her class parents aren't together, she just thinks that is what happened to us, and then there's Jared" she said.

"Jared" my blood was pumping, who the hell was Jared.

"Jared and I were in school together, we met when Syd was 2, we were together up until the beginning of this year, Sydney loved him, but she knew that he wasn't her father, he had her for a visit up until a few days ago" she explained.

"Bella, if I hadn't happened upon you today, would you have told me about her"

"Now that she is living here with me, yes I was planning on telling you as soon as I found the courage, but if we had never come back here, I don't know if I would have Edward" she was being honest, but it didn't help me feel better.

"Why not" I asked, I needed to know.

"You don't really understand Edward do you? You hurt me – destroyed me. Edward for over 2 years of my life you came in and out of it as you wanted, breaking my heart every time you left me and went back to Kate. The night before graduation you told me you loved me, we had sex and then you got back together with Kate. I allowed you to do that. But now, I wasn't going to allow you to do that to Sydney just come and go in her life – I wasn't going to have you hurt her as you did me!" Bella had tears in her eyes, and I realized once again the damage that I had inflicted on her.

"Bella, I know that this doesn't make sense but I hurt you to keep myself from hurting you more"

"Ok that might make sense on Planet Edward, but down here on earth it doesn't" she smirked a little as the old Bella came back into the room.

"I was messed up in High School, and you were so breakable, your spirit and your zeal for life, and I didn't want to drag you down with me, but I gravitated towards you, like you were my own personal ray of sunshine, and I thought that by not being with you, I was saving you from me, but I know now that I hurt you just as bad by messing with you" I hated that what I was true, I thought I was doing the right thing, but it wasn't the right thing, it was wrong for everyone involved.

"Well, if that is what you believe then you believe. I still don't understand it and I probably never will. Actually, I don't know if I want to try and understand it anymore.

"What about custody" she whirled around at me.

"What the hell about custody Edward" she snapped.

"Well she is my daughter too Bella" I was pushing her, I shouldn't but I was.

"A daughter that you chose not to have in your life because you didn't want me in your life Edward, and I'm not saying that like I expected to call and tell you and we would run off and get married and live happily after, but I never expected you to shut me out completely like you did. Edward, you have no real right over her. You made your bed and now lie in it." she answered back.

"Well I want some kind of arrangement please Bella, I can help you take care of her" I offered.

"Edward we don't need your money, and as for legally you don't have much of a claim for her, we weren't married, I am willing to work with you but the minute you start pulling your old crap, I stop being nice." She said and walked out of the room.

We walked outside, Bella sitting with Rose and Alice and I got the evil glare from both of them.

I walked a bit further, my daughter was playing with Emmett and Jasper I watched her, she was a mini-Bella but with my hair and my eyes. How that must have hurt Bella to look into those eyes everyday and remember the hurt and pain.

Emmett broke away and walked over to me.

"You knew" I said trying to hide me anger.

"Rose ran into Bella over Christmas and she was pregnant, Rose tried to talk to you all of break but you got pissed and then Rose told me and I tried as well, but you very nicely told us all to butt out, so we did but we never let Bella feel like she was alone" he said anger in his own voice.

"You could have just told me"

"No because you would have went there and drug that woman along and hurt Bella even more, and I had already watched you crush her heart and her spirit you weren't going to do anymore harm to her, and you aren't now either." Emmett said.

"What makes you think I would hurt them?"

"Because son, that is your pattern with Bella" my dad had joined the conversation.

"None of you thought that it was important for me to know that I had a daughter," I spat.

"We thought it was important to do what was in the best interest of the child, and until you got your act together, you were no good for them, Edward we all love those two and couldn't do anything but watch you hurt Bella repeatedly over the years, but I will god damned if I was going to let you hurt my grandchild because you were selfish." My father had never spoken to me like this except for the day he told me that Bella would be chosen over Kate and me any day, and he kept his word.

"I asked to have the chance to know my daughter, Bella said there would be conditions, and she flipped when I mentioned custody" the next thing I knew I was up against the house, Jasper in my face.

"Custody Edward, that will never happen as long as I breathe you will never take that child away from her mother" Jasper eyes showed pure hatred at me.

"I agree" Emmett said.

"I will never take her away from Bella, but she is my daughter and I want to be in her life" I said as Jasper let me go.

**BPOV**

Who the hell did he think he was, wanting to be a dad now? I tried to tell him for a long time and he ignored me and hurt me - and now he wants to ride in and be the hero?

"I can help support her" he said - like I needed his money. I had plenty of my own and we were happy. I wouldn't deny her a father but we weren't going to play his games either – it would be under my rules and no games attached.

I walked back outside and sat down with Rose and Alice and watched Sydney play with Emmett and Jasper.

"Well, how did it go?" Rose asked.

"He wants to a part of her life, he even asked about custody"

"What" they both cried together. "He won't take her away from you Bella, we won't let him" Alice said throwing evil stares at her brother who was also watching her play.

"We just need to take this one day at a time, she doesn't even know yet. My eyes drifted towards Emmett who was talking a bit heatedly with Edward. Carlisle joined in and Edward's face played through all the emotions. But I was on my feet when Jasper flew at him and put him against the house, yelling about something. Damn it – I told him not to fly off his handle.

"Sit down Bells, let the guys handle him for a while" Alice said.

I listened to her and sat back down. This day had not turned the way I had planned. This trip hadn't - but then again what in life had went the way that I planned.

We all ate after Esme and Carlisle brought the food over. Sydney making everyone laugh with her usual silly ways but everyone else was just getting to see. I watched as her family was now complete but she just didn't know it yet. I still had to tell my baby that Edward was her daddy.

Edward walked over to Sydney and me and asked if we would like to take a walk with him. Sydney wanted to go so I put on my best effort and smile for my daughter and we headed off in the direction of the river.

Edward pointed out different trees and things to her as they walked as I walked behind them giving them a chance to bond a little. He seemed good with her but it had only been a couple of hours. I didn't trust him and I knew it would take a long time for me to trust him especially with someone I lived for.

We reached the river and they walked along the bank picking wild flowers for Nana and I just sat and watched. They came over and sat with me and I knew that it was time.

"Baby," I said turning towards her. She was in between Edward and me, "You know how you always ask about your Daddy and how you knew he lived here in Forks"

She nodded, twirling a daisy in her hand.

"Peanut, Edward is your Daddy" I said, watching her look at him, tilt her head and smile.

"I know Momma," she said taking my hand and Edward's in her hands.

"You know" Edward asked, looking at me.

"Well yes silly daddy we look alike" she said reaching up with one hand and holding her curl up.

I just smiled at my daughter; she knew well I guess that made that easier.

"Do you have anything that you would like to talk about" her opinion mattered to me.

"I would like to know, where Daddy has been til now" she said looking at Edward.

I wanted to see him answer this question, and not lie to her.

"Well Princess, Daddy did some not nice things when he was younger and hurt momma's feelings" he stopped and looked at her.

"Why were you mean Daddy, did you have to go to time out" she asked him.

"I don't know why I was mean, it just happened, and it makes me sad now and I think I had 6 years of time out" the last comment was either a low blow or he own realitization of what he missed out on.

We sat there in silence Sydney leaned over on to Edward and fell asleep against him, he picked her and carried her. He reached behind him for my hand, but I kept my own with my body.

"Why Bella, why not just let me hold you too" he asked.

"This is about Sydney, Edward. Not me. You did a lot of damage and I can't just forget overnight. It's been six years, but I still remember. I am doing this for my daughter." I answered.

"Forgive and Forget Bella" he said quietly.

"I have forgiven you Edward, that part was easy. However the forgetting part is harder" and we walked into the house. I gathered up Sydney's things and said my goodbyes. Alice, Rose and I were going shopping tomorrow and Sydney was spending the day with her Uncles.

Edward carried her out and buckled her into her car seat, kissing her forehead.

"Bella, can we talk tomorrow night just the two of us, could Renee or Esme keep Sydney?" He asked.

"Talk, yes we can talk tomorrow night over coffee maybe?" I asked

"Sounds good, I can get you at 6?"

"Goodnight Edward" and I headed home.

**EPOV**

My daughter was amazing, smart and beautiful just like her mother; I was still hurting that I had been left out of her life, but happy to get the chance now.

Bella and I were going to dinner to discuss the future of our child; I would be on my best behavior, and not upset her like I did tonight.

I walked back in the house and was greeted by my family. They all looked at me half afraid of an outburst.

"Well" Emmett asked.

"Well what" I said sitting down and looking at them all.

"Were you on your best behavior" Alice asked.

"Yes Alice, Bella told Sydney I was her father and she told us that she knew already" I laughed remembering her calling me "Silly Daddy".

My family all chuckled, "What" I asked.

"She is a very special little girl Edward, raised by a very special mother" Esme said.

"I can see that" I knew where this was going.

"So you won't threaten her anymore with the word custody" Jasper asked his eyes flashing anger again.

"It wasn't like that, but no I just want to be a part of their lives" I said.

"Their lives" Rosalie asked her eyes matching Jaspers.

"Edward, before you go messing around and chasing Bella again remember that Sydney is involved and if you decided like you have in the past to leave her mother, your daughter will be hurt just as much" Carlisle said, repeating his earlier speech but changing it.

"I do not plan on chasing her, or messing with her but I do want to get to know them both and if somewhere down the line something happens then so be it" I said hoping that somewhere was now.

"Do you have plans to see them again" Alice asked.

"Well you guys are shopping tomorrow, but after work I asked Bella to have dinner with me so we can discuss things without and audience" I said looking around.

I said my goodnight, ready for tomorrow and tonight when my eyes closed it wasn't Bella I saw, it was the three of us as we sat together in the forest, we were a family.

"Daddy, Daddy, Daddy" I felt my bed moving violently and it took me a moment to realize that my daughter was bouncing on my bed. In a quick move I caught her mid bounce and hugged her tight and she giggled.

"Uncle Emmie said it was time to wake you up" she said smiling Bella's smile at me.

"I'm up, I'm up I'm up" I bounced her with every word. "What do we do now?"

She ran out of the room and I got dressed. Meeting them downstairs in the kitchen I grabbed a bowl and had ate my first bowl of lucky charms in probably 10 years.

I looked around smirked at my brother and Jasper who were also eating of pink bowls.

Sydney must have gotten to pick breakfast this morning. We ate our cereal and Sydney filled us all in on the episode of SpongeBob she had watched this morning.

I spent the day with Emmett, Jasper and my daughter we took her fishing down at the river and I had to catch myself from wanting to tie her to a tree to keep her from falling because she had no fear.

She caught 2 small fish, and Emmett pretended to be a bear and eat the fish before they put them back in the water.

I wondered what she was like as a baby. "What was she like as a baby," I asked Emmett as Jasper took her to walk on the fallen trees.

"Well I remember the day that Renee called, Rose was practically pacing the floor and when she was born I thought she was going to book a flight right then and then, Renee sent us pictures with her phone." He pulled out his phone and showed me a picture of a small baby, sleeping in a pink sleeper in Bella's arms.

"We went to go see her, you thought that we were going to a B & B for the weekend, and Rose fussed and made all over her, you know how Rose is with babies, but she was a special baby, always happy and pleasant."

I just listened as he told me about watching my daughter grow up, her walking, her first words.

"I know this can't be easy Edward, but we did it for Bella and Sydney, we watched you hurt Bella so much and the minute I held the sweet baby girl I vowed to keep her safe and if that meant safe from getting hurt when you walked out on them, then that's what I did." He said with a serious look on his face.

"I don't blame you all, I know what I did was messed up but its not going to happen again, I told myself when I ran into Bella at the store that if she gave me the smallest chance that I would spend the rest of my life making her happy, and now I just have add Sydney to the list as well" I said as Jasper and Sydney walked back.

"Daddy will you walk me now" I took her hand and she led me to the logs.

I liked when she called me Daddy, it made me feel good.

"Will you tell me about Jared please" I asked her.

"Jared and Mommy were together for a long time, but they aren't now at first I was sad, but then I remembered that momma had you and that she could be happy now."

"Are you happy?" I asked my six year old, wondering what the answer would be.

She nodded her head, "You won't make momma sad again will you Daddy"

"I am going to do everything that I can to make you and Momma happy baby" I said as she jumped off the high log and into my arms, I swung her in a circle and her stomach growled.

"Let's go see what Nana made for lunch" I said and we all headed back to the house. Bella and the girls would be gone for a bit longer. We are Sydney's choice again, Grilled Cheese with tomato soup and she told Esme all about her fish.

"Wow, sounds like someone has had a busy day" Esme said as Sydney yawned.

"Would you like to go up and lie in my bed and watch TV and take a rest" I asked. She nodded; I picked her up and carried her upstairs.

"Daddy stay here with me" she asked and I did I felt her body relax and she was asleep in minutes, I laid there with her watching her sleep and after a while I fell asleep too.

I woke up, to a gentle tapping on my arm and thought I was dreaming as Bella stood over us with a smile as she watched me nap with our daughter.

"Do you still want to have coffee?" she whispered.

I nodded, "Can we go now, Alice and Rose want some alone time with Sydney." She said.

I pulled my arm slowly out from under my daughter. "Let me get dressed, meet you downstairs in 10 minutes" she nodded.

I walked down the steps and saw her waiting, on our way I told her all about my day with Sydney and marveled at how special she was.

**BPOV**

He talked about Sydney with a look of pure worship in his eyes; maybe this wouldn't be so bad after all.

The coffee was excellent; I was enjoying the comforting cup when he started talking.

"Why did you bring that stuff to me that night we met in the store" he asked.

"It looked like stuff you might need, how else can you woo all the nurses when you are hairy and stinky" I laughed as he looked at me perplexed.

"Razors, Toothpaste and Deodorant remember" he caught on and laughed to.

"Your books are amazing Bella, I can't wait for the next one to come out" he said and I was shocked that he had read my books.

"You've read my books"

"Of course I have lots of time, they addicting" he said smiling at me, that smile that used to make me go weak in the knees, and even after all these years it still could. I shook my head slightly snapping out of my daze.

"What are we going to do about Sydney, now that I have met her I can't stand the thought of not seeing her" he said sadness in his voice.

"Well I can write anywhere, I just haven't decided where I want that to be yet, I thought about staying here so she could be near her grandparents because I will have to travel with my book in the future" I said.

"You would stay in Forks," he asked looking hopeful.

"I am considering it, she likes it here" I did too, bad memories and all.

Dinner was pleasant we talked about Sydney a lot and I promised to show him every home movie and photo album I had for the past 6 years.

"You tried to tell me and I wish that I had taken the time to listen" he apologized.

"I accept your apology, but it will take a lot for me to be able to trust you again"

We headed back to the Cullen's, we were starting down the right road, but I was preparing myself for the bumps ahead.

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AN: Thank you to my reviewers, I appreciate every single one.

**If you haven't reviewed please do so!!!**


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. Wish I did though but don't we all.**

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Chapter 6

My time spent in Forks was a lot longer then I had planned on it being, but I was writing and it was nice to have Sydney with her family during the time I couldn't be with her.

A month had gone by and we were spending most the time that Edward wasn't at the hospital together doing things with Sydney; Edward had stopped trying to be extra nice and push himself on me so that was nice.

But being around him was still hard.

It was the times when he was being a good father, well as good a father that he could be in the month since he had met his daughter. The times when we was just being himself, laughing with his family and having a goodtime is when it was the hardest to be near him because I started to forget about the hurt and the pain that he had caused me.

I didn't want to be bitter, but I made myself remember the tears, and the way I felt when he told me he didn't want me in his life anymore as I held my newborn baby in my arms. And the happy feelings would go away. In time I might forget; but it wasn't going to be so soon, I told myself.

I was needed in San Francisco to go over some things with Jared, and I had planned on letting Edward keep Sydney they would both enjoy the time together, one on one. I hadn't asked Edward yet, but I knew that he would be delighted to keep her, maybe on the way home tonight if the evening went well.

Today we were picking him up from work and heading down to the carnival in Port Angeles, Sydney was excited and had not stopped talking about it for days.

"I want to go in and say Hello to Pappy Carlisle Momma" I unbuckled her and held her hand as we walked through the sliding doors, Edward was walking towards us.

"Daddy" Sydney yelled and ran towards her dad. Jessica looked up from behind her desk at the three of us, the wheels spinning in her mind. By this time most of Forks knew that Edward and I had a child, but they didn't know the whole story so that was nice.

"Can I say Hi to Pappy" she asked him.

"He's over here, let's go" he took her towards the other door.

"So Bella I never knew that you were one for big secrets" Jessica said with her usual snotty tone.

"Just because you didn't know doesn't mean it was a secret"

"So you just didn't come back into town and spring a child on the Cullen's, that's the story going around" she was loving this.

"The Cullen's have known about Sydney all of her life, just because they didn't feel the need to share it with YOU, doesn't mean anything" I snapped, and walked over to Edward and Sydney.

Once we were in the car and on our way he asked what happened.

"You know Jessica, she always has to have her nose in everything" I said, my life used to be so much less complicated before I came home.

"How's the book coming" he asked nicely changing the subject.

"It's going great I have been on a roll, Jared said the publishers are very happy with my chapters" I said watching the scenery go by.

"Jared, as in you ex"

"Jared, works for the same publishing company that I did, or do work for and he does the editing on my books, they want me to come down and look over some things and go over my tour schedule for when its finished." I almost felt guilty that he didn't know that, but then I snapped out of it, Edward and I were not a couple there was no need to feel guilty.

We didn't talk much the rest of the way, Sydney kept asking about what might or might not be at the Carnival. As we parked the car, she got very excited almost bouncing out of the car at the sight in front of her. Edward bought her tickets so she could ride and we headed off.

It seemed like almost everyone from Forks was here, I had stopped to talk to Angela and Ben Chaney who were watching there little boy Scott ride the little ferris wheel, Edward had taken Sydney to the Carousel her favorite and I knew that they would be there for a while.

"Bella, I am so happy to see you" Angela said hugging me, she had been my other good friend here. "Can we get together and catch up this week"

"I would love to, what day is good for you" we talked about schedules, they were living her in Port Angeles, so I said I would come down here, it would be nice to get away from Forks for a day.

We said our goodbyes as Scott wanted to ride the motorcycles, and I was heading to the Carousel when I saw a whirl of red hair leaving Edward's side, my thoughts immediately went the Kate, but then I calmed myself down just because it was red hair doesn't mean anything.

"Did you have fun" I asked as we finally talked her off the ride.

"Yes" she jumped into her dad's arms and said she wanted to ride the boats, the evening progressed and we ran into the Chaney's again, Scott and Sydney rode several rides together and she called him her Best Friend when the evening was ending.

She fell asleep before we were out of the parking lot, and I noticed that Edward was remarkably quiet, and the wheels started spinning again, if Kate was back things were going to change and I was going to watch out for every little sign to prepare myself.

"So did you see anyone you knew tonight" I asked

"Just the same people you did" he replied short and sweet.

"You're quiet" I was trying to get him to talk; I needed to know what was going on.

"I've had a long day" and I left it at that.

**EPOV**

I noticed right away that Bella was uncomfortable at the hospital and I would be having a talk with Ms. Stanley about it.

We headed to the Carnival, Bella had been very generous lately and the three of us had been having a great time. But Bella had also needed to work on her book, so I spent time with Sydney as she wrote.

I was shocked to hear that she still spoke with Jared on a day to day basis, they were broken up but he was editing her book, that was something I never knew, and it upset me now to think about it.

What if he wanted her and my daughter back, would Bella go? What would I do without them? I was going to stop thinking about it, Sydney was dying to ride the Carousel and that's where we were heading Bella had stopped to talk to Angela and Ben Chaney it was nice to see her smiling and laughing.

"Come on Daddy, I want to ride it five times" Sydney said pulling me towards the ride.

"Five times, won't you get dizzy" I laughed there was no stopping her when she set her mind to something.

I watched her show the ride attendant which one she wanted to ride on and he lifted her up. I was waving each time she went by when I heard it.

"Edward" I spun to the side that my name had come from and saw her standing there.

"Kate" I said hoping she would just leave, I turned and thanking god that Bella wasn't watching.

"It's been too long" she purred, crap, crap, crap I needed her to leave before she messed everything up.

When I didn't answer I thought that she would get the hint but instead she turned and faced the ride, noticing when I waved to Sydney who was on her third ride.

I watched as she looked from me to Sydney and then back again recognition dawning on her face.

"Yours" she asked. I nodded.

"Well things sure have changed," she said looking at Sydney once again. I looked back over towards Bella again. This time Kate's glance followed.

"Guess I should have known that one" she said.

"Kate, I can't really talk" I wanted her to leave.

"I'm back in town Edward, I will talk to you soon" she said and walked away, just as I noticed Bella was walking over.

Shit, had Bella seen her, if so this wasn't going to be good. Bella and I had been working on her trusting me again, and I had been hoping that after time she would love me again. But the minute she thinks that Kate is back, it's all going to go south.

Bella acted like she hadn't seen her, so I breathed easier and the night went on nicely.

We were in the car, Sydney was fast asleep when I knew that Bella could sense the change in my mood, because she started asking questions.

"So did you see anyone you knew tonight" she asked, except for the twenty minutes she had talked with Angela we had been together all night. She had seen Kate.

"Just the same people you did" I didn't know what else to say, she was watching me as I answered.

"You're quiet" I was being quiet, not that we spent every moment chatting but I hadn't said a word since we had gotten into the car.

"I've had a long day" and I left it at that, hoping that she would take the excuse, or just come right out and say that she saw her.

I dropped Bella and Sydney off at Charlie's and headed home, hoping that tonight's run in with Kate was a fluke and that she wouldn't contact me again, I needed to be with my family, I was a different person now then I was six years ago.

I dreamt bad dreams that night, glad when the alarm went off in the morning, I had to work and was hoping to see my girls in this evening.

Stop it Edward, I said to myself don't push Bella or you'll push her away.

I called when I was doing some paperwork.

"Hello" I loved the sound of her voice.

"Hey Bella, is this a bad time" she sounded flustered.

"I was talking to my editor on the other line" she was talking to Jared, keep it together Edward.

"I can let you go, I just wanted to see if we all could have dinner tonight"

"Edward we can't, we promised Charlie and Renee that we would have dinner with them" Damn, well ok maybe tomorrow sometime.

"I'll see what's going on" she said and we hung up.

Tuesday was much of the same run around, she was too busy writing and Mom, Rose and Alice had taken Sydney to Seattle overnight for a big shopping trip, so Wednesday was out too. I had asked Bella to have lunch with me, but she was meeting Angela.

I was officially worried now, something was up. My phone vibrated in my pocket and I answered it quickly hoping that it was Bella changing her mind.

"Hello" I said quickly. But Bella's voice didn't answer back.

"Hello Edward," I closed my eyes why now, why now when everything was almost perfect.

"Kate, I can't talk now I am at work"

"Can we talk tomorrow then, maybe over coffee?"

"I suppose, but then that's it Kate, no more" I would tell her again tomorrow to stay out of my life.

Work drug on, and on not that I was looking forward to seeing Kate, but I just wanted to get it over with.

I changed my clothes and headed to Port Angeles, we met at the same coffee shop Bella and I had gone to.

"What's up Kate" I said getting it out on the table now.

"You have a daughter Edward," she said, her eyes flashing anger and jealousy.

"Yes, Bella and I have a daughter" I watched her expression as I said Bella's name.

"You are sure she's yours, you were only with her once"

"More sure then I have ever been in my life"

"Did you have a paternity test done?" Ok I knew where this was going.

"No, I didn't need one, she is my child"

"Funny, you told me that if I was pregnant I had to have one done, but because it's Bella you have no doubts." I pinched the bridge of my nose.

"Kate, you were so desperate to keep me that I wasn't sure just how far you would go" I could not believe that the girl I kept hurting Bella for was the person I was saying this too.

It showed me a lot about the relationship that I had with Kate, it was so messed up I had used her and she had used as well but I had never thought about her reason's for being with me.

I knew my reason for keeping her around so that I wouldn't be tempted to be with Bella were wrong, and I felt bad for using her.

"Why did you want to be with me Kate?"

"Honestly, at first I really liked you and I thought that you liked me, but after the first time we broke up and you went running to Bella, your perfect girl I knew then that I hated her. But then you came back to me, and you kept coming back to me, and I got to watch her suffer, like I suffered knowing that I could never be the girl that you actually were in love with, but the one that you settled for"

"I was wrong to do that to you Kate" I apologized.

"I don't want your apologies Edward, I did it because I wanted to and because I wanted you" wow things were really messed up, no wonder my family didn't like me.

"I'm different now Kate, I realized that back in school when I ended things with you that I didn't like who I was and I wanted to be the person I should be and now I want to be a good father and whatever Bella will let me to her as well"

"Bella, it always goes back to Bella. What ever happened to being afraid that you hurt her, aren't you still afraid of that, people don't change Edward, we are who we are"

I sat there for a minute, debating if she was right, why was I here I didn't have to answer the phone, I didn't have to come here. Was I going down that path again.

No, I didn't want this again, my family was just now starting to like me, I had my daughter and she was my joy now in life, and Bella I couldn't and I wouldn't hurt Bella again, if she knew that I was here she would go, she would take Sydney go and I couldn't have that.

The bell on the door of the coffee shop opened, I was ready to leave I just needed to say one more thing.

"Kate, I came here today to tell you that I will no longer answer your calls, or see you. What we did was wrong back then and I want no part of it now"

I stood up and headed for the door when I saw Angela and she was shooting daggers at me.

"Angela" I asked puzzled.

"You are such an Asshole Edward Cullen, you were in High School when we all stood by and watched you hurt Bella, and you are one still today" she was shaking "If Bella is smart she will take that precious little girl and leave with her so that you can't hurt either of them ever again"

"Bella, what" I was confused and then it hit me like a freight train, Bella and Angela spent the day together today, if Angela was here then Bella had been too, and she had just seen me with Kate.

**BPOV**

I didn't feel bad blowing Edward off, I knew it had been Kate at the Carnival and I was just preparing myself for the future.

Wednesday I met with Angela and it felt so good to be with her again, she was always so laid back and relaxing. She listened as I told her all about Sydney and the past six years over lunch and we were going to grab a cup of coffee before I headed home, the girls would all be back from Seattle, and maybe Sydney could have dinner with her dad.

We were walking into the coffee shop and I remembered coming here with Edward and talking about the stuff that had happened. When I glanced over and saw the messy bronze hair, I could tell it was him no one else had his hair color except for Sydney. I was going to go over and say Hello when I saw that he wasn't alone.

Sitting there with him was the last person I had ever wanted to see in my life again, and they were together, this couldn't be happening he honestly could be back with her again, but there conversation although unheard was from the looks of it very intense.

"Ang, I have to go" I said and she looked at the table where Edward was sitting.

"Bella," she said trying to stop me.

"Please Ang, I can't go through this again, Sydney can't go through this" and I ran out the door, got into my car and drove as fast as I could.

Tears burned my eyes. Stupid Bella you should have known that this would happen this is what always happens, did you actually think that it would change.

My phone vibrated, I hit the answer button, hoping it wasn't Edward.

"Bella" the male voice said and I allowed myself to breathe again.

"Jared, hey what's going on"

"Tanya wants to go over something's, I know its short notice but can you come down here tomorrow?"

"Yes, I am bringing Sydney with me too, can you book our tickets out of Port Angeles." This was perfect I needed to get away from this place and figure out what my next move was.

"I can't wait to see you both, I have missed you two around here it's been far too quiet" he said. "I will call you with your flight time" I finished the phone call as I pulled into the Cullen's Driveway.

Hold it together Bella; do not go in there upset. I got out of my car and walked in.

"Momma, Momma look at the new dress Aunt Ali got me" and she twirled around in a green summer dress.

"Sweetie, you and mommy are going to go away for a few days; can you go get your stuff gathered up for me please?" I was mad now, mad that this shit was happening again.

"Where are we going Momma, is Daddy coming" My eyes closed as she said his name, tears for her and anger at myself were fighting there way through.

"No Peanut, just me and you. Auntie Tanya needs to go over some stuff with momma and Jared wants to see you too he misses your jokes, now please hurry we have to catch a plane" and she took off after her bags.

"Bella, what's wrong and don't say nothing because I know something happened" Alice said as she, Esme and Rose sat down on the couch. Jasper, Emmett and Carlisle were sitting on the other side.

"Cliff notes version, I saw Edward with Kate in Port Angeles" a million things were said at once.

"Please don't leave Bella," Esme asked.

"It's only for a couple of days, I need to get away from here and think about this, if she is back in his life again things are going to change" I was rambling.

"If it's what you need to do Bella, but please remember that we love you both and we can't stand to lose either of you again" Carlisle said.

Sydney had come back in with her bag and she hugged and kissed everyone and we left. I got the message with the flight from Jared and we needed to be at the airport in an hour. A quick trip to Charlie's I left a note explaining our sudden trip and we were off.

On the way there, every song on the radio was sad/sappy/leaving so I hit the IPod the first song was White Horse by Taylor Swift, I hit next Fall for You by Secondhand Serenade, I kept hitting next wondering when I loaded all these depressing songs, giving up I hit the CD button and listen to Sydney cheer as Hannah Montana rocked out Best of Both Worlds.

**EPOV**

I sped home hoping that I wasn't too late, I ran in the house looking for them but only finding my family sitting there staring at me, their faces all showing different signs of anger and rage.

"Where are they" I begged.

"What did you do?" Emmett asked. Rose placed a hand on him keeping him seated.

"Why were you with Kate" my mother asked. Well there you had it.

"It's not what you think, she found me at the Carnival Sunday, and then started called I met her to tell her to leave me alone, I swear," they had to believe me.

"Well son, they're gone" my father said, in a tone that said he didn't really believe me.

"Where did they go" I asked but this time I turned and faced Alice, she was my twin I hoped that she would tell me.

"They will be back in a few days Edward, maybe you need to wait until they come back and then talk to her" she told me, thanks for the help sis.

"I need to tell her now, or else she will think the worst, what if she doesn't come back, what if they don't come back?"

"They went to San Francisco to meet with her publisher and editor" the voice that answered me was Rosalie.

"Thank you" I said, "Why did you tell me"

"Because you're right the more she thinks that you are hurting them, the worse it will be and then if she doesn't come back we lose them both again, go Edward, go get our girls, and do not screw this up"

I ran upstairs booked my flight, Googled Bella's address, grabbed a few things and headed out the door, saying a little prayer that I could do something right for once.

**BPOV**

The flight went smooth, Sydney loves to fly and the flight attendants made all over her as usual.

We landed and we're heading out to the rental car desk, when Sydney yelled "Jared" I turned and he picked her up giving her a big hug and kiss.

"Hey Babydoll, I've missed you" he told her.

"I've missed you too Bella," and he pulled me in for what I thought was a hug until he turned his head and kissed me.

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AN: Edward, Edward, Edward, he was making progress I wonder how things will go now.

**Please Review!!!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight, however tonight at midnight I will own the DVD.**

**A special shout out to darcy13, who asked some great questions that I had a blast answering, which also gave me some info that I am going to use in Chapter 8.**

**Don't forget to Review!!!!!**

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Chapter 7

**BPOV**

I pulled away from Jared, looking at him with a mixture of shock and confusion.

"What the hell was that" I asked.

"Aw Momma you said a bad word" my daughter had just witnessed that whole thing, great another thing to have to explain later.

"I was just really happy to see you mommy baby doll" Jared answered her as we headed out the door, and I realized that he was going the wrong way.

"Um my apartment is that way" I pointed out.

"Well I thought it would be nice if we all spent some time together so I got some stuff at my place" he said smiling at me.

"That's not the best idea Jared, we aren't together anymore and we haven't been for a while now, I would like you to take me to my house, if you want to spend time with us then you can do it there."

He did come into my apartment, Sydney had fallen asleep on the way home and after tucking her into bed, I ordered dinner from my favorite Italian restaurant. I decided to jump in the shower while we waited for it to come.

The warm water ran over my body working the tension out, I needed to decide what I was going to do about Edward, and now the whole Jared thing that just was more confusing.

I was getting out of the shower when the doorbell rang, and my stomach growled I couldn't wait for dinner, I was getting dressed when I heard the shouting.

**EPOV**

The flight was quick, maybe because I was going crazy thinking about everything. I jumped in the rental car and headed out to Bella's.

My stomach was in knots and my heart was hurting, I couldn't handle losing my daughter; she was such a joy and happiness in my life, one I never thought that I would find.

I ran to her door and knocked; ready to say everything I could to her to bring them home.

When the door opened I thought I had the wrong house.

"Can I help you?" the man asked.

"I'm here to see Bella"

"How do you know Bella"

"How do you know Bella" I countered back.

"I'm her fiancé'" he said, and my face dropped.

"She doesn't have a fiancé" I said.

"How the hell would you know, and who the hell are you" he yelled.

"I'm Edward Cullen, I am Sydney's father"

"You have a lot of nerve coming here, do you know that" he yelled.

"And you have a lot of nerve to call yourself her fiancé when you broke up with her months ago" I yelled back.

"What the hell are you both shouting about" Bella was standing in the living room her face livid.

"Bella" I said pushing past Jared and running to her, but he grabbed me and tried to stop me. I swung my fist around and connected it with his jaw. He dropped to the floor and Bella went to him.

"Why did you do that" she asked. "And why are you here"

"Bella, can we talk please" I asked nicely.

"I don't think that is a good Idea" Jared added.

"I don't think that is any of your business" I said "unless in the five minutes Bella has been here she really she has decided to become your fiancé again" and I turned to look at Bella as I said that.

"What" she said dropping Jared hand and standing up. "Did you tell him we were together again?"

"Bella babe I've missed you so much"

"I'm sorry Jared but I haven't, I need to speak to Edward, you and I will talk tomorrow"

He walked out the door without saying a word. Bella spun to face me,

"You never answered my question what are you doing here?"

"I came to explain what you saw today, because I know that you saw me with Kate and I know what you thought, but its not that I promise."

"What is then Edward, because I know how your routine goes and I really don't feel like going through it again or watching my daughter suffer because you can't leave that hag alone"

"I really did a number on you, I know that and if it take me the rest of my life to prove to you that I care about you and that I am not that person any more then that is what I will do" I begged.

"Are you hungry" she asked.

"What, oh well yes I guess so" I was hungry "But I don't want to impose"

"Well you won't be I ordered dinner and the delivery guy is walking up right now" she said and there was a knock on the door, I opened it, paid for the food and closed the door.

I turned around with the bags and she was holding money "I was paying for that"

"I am here uninvited I am buying your dinner" I watched her move around and get plates and silverware from the cupboards, and glasses down along with a bottle of wine.

She noticed my look at the wine. "What Edward I have had a very long day"

"I wasn't saying a thing" I said sitting down across from her, we ate salads and chicken parmesan and garlic bread in silence.

"What did I see today Edward, if it's not what I thought" she asked finishing her wine and pouring another cup.

"Sunday at the Carnival while Sydney was on the Carousel Kate came over to talk to me, I blew her off but then she started calling me repeatedly, and I didn't want her come around the house or track you down because she saw Sydney, so I agreed to meet her and there I told her that she was not welcome in my life, and not wanted in my life"

"Why didn't you tell me, why hide it from me"

"Because I didn't want you to do this, I knew that her being around would scare you and I wanted to save you as much heartache as I could, but when I saw Angela and she told me, I rushed home and I knew that you were gone." I stopped looking at her, trying to figure out what she was thinking.

"I should have told I know that now, but I just wanted to get rid of her, I made the mess years ago and I need to clean it up." I said.

"I thought that I saw her Sunday, and yes you should have just told me, but that aside I can't believe that your family told you were we went"

"Well they weren't going to but I argued my case enough and Rose told me"

"Rose told you, I would never have guessed that" she was shocked "What was this argument that you put up that impressed Rose"

"They wanted me to wait until you came home to talk to you, but I said that the longer you sat and thought about it the more that you would think the worst and I could not handle loosing Sydney again or you for that fact"

**BPOV**

The wine was relaxing me more then I thought it would, that or Edward had just told me that he was afraid of loosing me. I got up from the table.

"Bella please give me a chance don't walk away" he pleaded.

"I am just going to make some coffee, to go with the canoli" I told him, I needed to clear my head.

While the coffee was brewing I leaned against the counter my eyes closed, I heard him get up and walk over he started rubbing my shoulders, God it felt good I moaned slightly at the muscles in my back loosening, he stopped and stepped away afraid he had crossed the limit.

"You can keep doing that for about 5 hours" I joked needing to lighten the mood a little bit.

"Come on" I said grabbing two cups and gesturing for him to grab the dessert, we went into the living room and I pulled out a DVD.

"Are we going to watch a movie" he looked at the box I had taken the disc from it was the homemade kind "This is some naughty night-time thing with Jared is it because I really don't want to see that" he joked. I laughed because it was funny.

I smacked his arm and pressed play.

On the screen appeared me holding Sydney she was a few hours old, he got up and walked over to the TV got on his knees so that his face was next to it and he stared at our daughter, tiny and pink. He raised his hand up to the screen and touched her face.

He moved his face back a little but never moved from the front of the TV as he watched her laughing with food on her face, the first time she crawled, her first tooth, when she said her first word, which ironically was DaDa, he spun around and looked at me.

"Most babies say that first, but I showed her your photo everyday Edward" I said as he cried. I moved down next to him, and we watched her walk to Emmett, and he picked her up and spun her around.

He cried more when he saw his family gathered around her as we sang Happy Birthday to her when she turned a year old.

He sat there for hours watching his daughter's life, I left only to check on Sydney and when I came back I was carrying photo albums for him.

I fell asleep around her 4th birthday, today had been a long stressful day.

**EPOV**

I sat there on the floor and watched my daughter grow up, I cried the entire time for missing it and for knowing that it was my fault that I had missed it.

I hated Kate for telling me that day that she thought she was pregnant, I should have stuck with Bella, and then if she was pregnant I would have faced it. I thanked god everyday for the negative test, not realizing that in Arizona Bella had a positive one.

I hated myself for what I had put my entire family through and all the pain that I caused, I wanted to make things right. I needed to tell Bella the truth and the whole truth, it wouldn't make her forget but maybe it would help her to understand.

Bella had fallen asleep on the couch, when the movie was over I picked her up and carried her down the hallway finding her bedroom, I covered her up and went back to the living room, she had set albums out for me and I would look at them tomorrow.

I fell asleep dreaming of a different video, one that I was in.

**BPOV**

I woke up in my own bed, and it was early I walked silently out to the kitchen to get some coffee. Edward was on the couch, so it hadn't all been a dream.

I was supposed to meet with Tanya and Jared at 10, Tanya I was happy to see but I was dreading seeing Jared, what had possessed him last night to kiss me, try to take us to his place and then tell Edward we were back together.

Another lyric in my country song, I heard Sydney up and moving around 8:30 and I knew the minute she saw Edward she would wake him.

"Momma," she said rubbing her eyes and walking in.

"What would you like for breakfast peanut?"

"French toast with banana's" she said, that was her favorite. I smiled.

"Why don't you go wake Daddy and see if he wants some" she jumped up and down.

"Daddy's here, you said he wasn't coming momma" she ran over and saw him on the couch the look on her face made me realize that he was going to be a part of her life always, but at least I still got to decide how much a part of my life he was.

"Well he missed you, and he wanted to come and see you" she smiled at that.

I started mixing the batter as she pounced on him; I held back the laughter as she giggled at him. It was nice to have something to do for a while.

She took his hand and led him to the kitchen, he smiled at me his eyes were red and puffy. I handed him a cup of coffee and a plate and we all sat down and ate breakfast.

"Shoot I said looking at the clock, I have to go to a meeting can you look after Sydney" I asked Edward.

"Yes, I think we can handle that" he smiled at her.

"You don't need to go back, what about the hospital" I didn't want him missing work.

"I called Dad this morning and he is covering my shift today and then I am off for a few days" he said spearing a banana with his fork.

I kissed my daughter's forehead and ran out the door, then ran back in. "I don't have a car" I said remembering Jared's interception of me when I went to get one.

"Here" Edward tossed me keys. "It's the Volvo, the red one".

I yelled thanks as I headed out the door again. The familiar drive to the office was calming the sun was shining I had missed that. I went straight to Tanya's office and knocked on the door before opening it.

"Bella" she said moving away from her desk and coming to hug me.

"I've missed you" I told her and then she made me tell her all about the last month of life in Forks.

"I think you've found your next book" she laughed. "Why are you here though, we could have spoken about this schedule over the phone" my look must have been puzzled because she added "Not that I am not glad to see you though"

"Jared called last night and said you needed to see me today, I flew down here last night, you didn't need me to come" I asked a little upset now.

She shook her head no, "I need to go have a word with Jared, and I think you need to find someone new to edit my book Tanya".

I headed down to Jared's office; he wasn't surprised to see me or the mad look on my face. I walked in and shut the door behind me.

"Would you care to explain why I flew down here last night with my daughter for no good reason" I was done being nice to the men in my life, why were they all assholes.

"Well I didn't expect you to bring Sydney but I was happy to see her, I meant what I said last night I have missed you and I want you and Sydney back in my life Bella"

I took a deep breath and I held it inside, then I opened my eyes. "Jared, you were the biggest help to me through the years and you were a great friend to me when I needed one, but what you said back in February was true, we had drifted apart, I wasn't in love with you anymore and you weren't in love with me either"

"That's not true Bella, this is all because of him isn't it, and your new attitude is because Edward is back in your life, I cannot believe that everyhing he put you through you are just going to go right back to him"

"The attitude I have at this moment is because you lied to me, disrupted my life because you wanted me to come back to you, I dropped everything and flew down here" I was angry he didn't realize the day I had yesterday and now this too.

"Bella, he is no good for you and no good for Sydney, can't you see that"

"And you are what's right for us, Jared you couldn't even keep her the month we set aside for her to be with you and as for me, Edward and I are not together, do you honestly think that I would just forget everything that happened and jump into his arms or his bed the minute I saw him" I was standing up now, yelling at him, he put his head down.

"Bella please think about it, we were great together and we will be great together as we work on this book, just give me time and you will see that I am the one who is right for you"

"In February you didn't love me anymore, when I went home in June you still didn't have any feelings for me but now you love me, that's not how it works Jared."

I headed for the door, "And as for my book, I asked Tanya to find another editor to work in it"

"Bella you are making a huge mistake, you need me your book needs me I have helped you be what you are today" that was the last straw.

"I do not need you, and as for my books, yes you edit the sentences, fix coma's and check certain facts, but my books are just that Jared MINE, I am sorry that nothing you have submitted as panned out but DO NOT try to take credit for MY WORK" and I slammed the door.

I walked back to Tanya's office and told her the whole story, she was fuming mad by the time I finished.

"So he lied to get you here, then insulted your work what a piece of shit he is, I always thought he was a nice guy" she shrugged.

"I was thinking Victoria for my books, I have always liked her work and we get along well" I saidmore like thinking out loud.

"Sounds good I will get everything from Jared personally and take it to her, if he gives you any trouble you tell me immediately and I will take care of him" she said and I headed home, I really wanted to see my daughter now.

I walked in the door and she had Edward coloring with her while Enchanted played on TV, he was wrapped around her little finger.

"Momma, your home look at my picture I made, Daddy has been coloring the same one forever" she laughed.

I looked and laughed Edwards Mickey Mouse picture was perfect, "A little obsessive Edward" I plopped down exhausted by the mornings events and it was only past noon.

"Sydney would you like to take Daddy down to the wharf" I asked her

"Yes, yes, yes" she jumped up. "Can you please go get dressed then" I said as she took off running.

"What's wrong Bella" Edward asked.

"Well it turns out that I wasn't needed here, I flew down here last night for no reason at all, and Jared tricked me into coming because he wants to get back together with me" I said.

He came over and sat by me, patting my leg with his hand. I started to cry my wall coming down a little.

"When will this roller coaster ride called my life ever stop twisting and turning, I just can't take much more of it all" I said.

He wrapped an arm around me and pulled me into him and I cried, I didn't care that he was crossing all the lines I put up to keep him away.

"Bella, I know I have caused the most of the turns and twists in your life and I hate myself for that, for every tear you have shed for all the sadness that you have felt over the years, I hate who I was then. I want to make you happy, you and Sydney. I know that I haven't earned it yet, but I am begging you to just give me a little bit and I will show you that I am the man I should have been for you"

God did he sit here and write this down, it was almost to perfect. I broke away from him muttering about getting changed, but really I needed my safe distance back.

We headed down to the wharf, Sydney showing Edward all the places that she loved, we ate chowder at my favorite seafood restaurant and home-made ice cream as we watched the waves crashing around us. Here in this place where my memories were good ones without all the Forks memories of drama, happiness and tears I was happy. Maybe Sydney and I would just stay here, where we belonged.

"Momma, can we go home now I miss my Nana's and Pappy's and Auntie Ali. Auntie Rose, Uncle Jazz and Uncle Emie." With that I realized that Forks would be my home now, Sydney was happy there with her family, and I wouldn't take that away from her.

"Whenever you are ready peanut we will go, do you want to fly or shall we drive home and sight see with Daddy" they both looked at me.

"Really Bella, we could drive back like a road trip" Edward was shocked. So was I all the alone time with him wouldn't be good on my resolve but then again maybe we did need that time.

"Yes, if that what Sydney wants" she smiled and finished her ice cream. I turned to Edward "What you asked last night, I am willing to give you a little bit, but be wise with it because I don't know if I can give much more if you treat it badly"

"I won't Bella, I promise that I won't.

**AN: so what did you think about that…Jared was a piece of work too. But don't worry Edwards going to get a little competition for Bella's attention when they get home from their road trip.**

**Please review, please please please!!!!!**


	8. Chapter 8

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In honor of the DVD coming out today I am posting another Chapter, I won't be home later since I will be getting my copy. So here is a gift to you!!!

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Chapter 8

After a quick shopping trip, we piled into the rented Volvo and started the 15 hour drive back to Forks, we were splitting the driving and stopping along the way at places that looked interesting, and we would of course have to sleep.

This was going to be a good trip hopefully, giving us all chance to just get to know each other. We made our first stop in Eureka California and made a trip to the Sequoia Park Zoo, Sydney decided that every animal was her favorite.

"Daddy which one is your favorite" she asked him, he tilted his head and pretended to think. "I think that I would have to pick the Spider Monkey" and she giggled as he pulled her up and on his back.

"How about you Momma"

"Well here at this zoo I think that the Chacoan Peccary is really neat"

We ate a quick lunch and headed to Klamath, Edward wanted to see the big statues of Paul Bunyan and Babe, and we were going to spend the night in a little cabin village there.

I listened as Edward told Sydney the story of Paul and Babe, and then we made a trip to the beach, we were all tired and starving, Edward had found a unique restaurant during research the Forest Café' the inside looked like a forest.

However when we checked into our cabin I was surprised by the lack of beds, I turned and looked at Edward.

"I swear I booked 2 doubles" he said looking at the queen and twin bed in the room.

"It's ok Edward, we will be just fine" We were all showered and Sydney was tucked into the twin bed, Edward asked me if we could talk, I gestured outside to the tiny deck.

**EPOV**

Today had been amazing, showing Sydney the different places and telling her stories like my dad used to do for us. I just never wanted this trip to end right now; I knew that I needed to talk to Bella. When she got out of the shower I got my courage up, we were sitting out on the little deck, and I had grabbed two beers out of the mini bar and sat down across from her.

"I need to tell you some things about me that you don't know."

"I'm listening"

"Back in high school, when we met and then after I dealt with depression, I didn't tell anyone about it because I was embarrassed about it and thought that I could handle it, but I was wrong, and that is the biggest reason I didn't want to have a relationship with you, I didn't want you to suffer with me, the plan backfired because you still suffered."

"Edward, we all would have helped you, your parents, all of us" she said.

"When I met Kate, at first she was easy to talk to and someone outside of my family and that was an added bonus. I was drawn to her for that reason too. The time we split up though and I started dating you, when she wanted me back I went, and she hated you because you were the one that I wanted to be with, needed to be with, and by this time she had figured out how to work my depression to her favor."

She was just watching me talk, not interrupting just listening.

"When we broke up before graduation, I was looking forward to starting a new life, you and I were together and things were perfect, the morning of graduation she called me and needed to talk to me, I went over to her house where she proceeded to tell me that she was late and might be pregnant, but as there was no time to stop and buy a test she agreed to do it after graduation, well of course at graduation she decided to make a her presents known to you."

"I take it the test was negative" Bella spoke for the first time.

"If I had been smart, I would have told you and then let you decide if you still wanted to be with me, but I got scared and came to your house and you wouldn't speak to me, you told me to go away and to leave you alone, so I did"

"I sunk into a deeper depression your last two weeks you were here, you wouldn't look at me, or speak to me and I am not saying that I blame you at all, but when you started calling me, I was so afraid of putting you through everything again that I wouldn't talk to you, if I would have I would have sucked you back into my negative environment"

"Did you get help Edward, or are you still suffering now"

"When I got to Harvard and got away from Kate physically, I snapped out of it a little and then I started speaking with a therapist, and although Kate would call me everyday I didn't feel the need to be with her anymore, and the things that she had said to me over the last two years didn't effect me the way they used to"

"What did she say to you, please tell me" she asked.

"That I was broken, and that no woman besides her would want a man that wasn't whole, that I was desperate for affection and would take it out anywhere I could find it, and that if I cared about you at all I would just leave you be because you were too good for me and she was the only one who understood me"

"Edward, how could you believe that?"

"The therapist finally helped me to see that she would tell me this when I was the most susceptible and that with my depression I was already so down on myself that I believed it, it was emotional abuse and I was weak."

**BPOV**

Listening to this from him, I felt so bad, I spent so much time around him that surely I should have seen that he was depressed, or his parents for that matter, we could have helped him.

I looked at him and saw that as he was telling me this, he was looking broken and rejected; I reached out and took his hand trying to comfort him.

"I went home at Christmas that first year and I wasn't 100% yet, and Kate came too and with her being there I relapsed a little, then when Rose and Emmett told me that I really needed to call you back, I just couldn't not because I didn't want to but because I wasn't the man I needed to be, to be with you Bella"

"When did you end things with Kate for good?"

"March after that Christmas, with weekly sessions and some mild anti-depressants I just had enough and cut all ties, and although I desperately wanted to call you, the Dr was against it because he was afraid like me that I would relapse and the hurt would start all over again, so I listened to him and when you called that day I had to tell you to stop calling me because I believed my Dr, it was too soon, but I wish I had known, I would have found a way to deal with my problems to be there for you Bella and Sydney."

"Did you talk about me in your therapy?"

"Yes, many hours were spent discussing how I treated you, and that was the reason that he felt running back you wouldn't be good for either of us, I needed to learn to love myself in order to love you"

"Edward" I whispered my resolve was weakening how could it not, the bitter thoughts that I used as my shield were trying to come up, but for tonight I pushed them away, tonight I needed to be his friend.

"I don't expect you to say anything Bella, if you want to that is fine but I imagine you need time to process all of this on top of everything else, but I couldn't keep it from you any longer, last night when I was watching my daughter grow up on film I vowed to be the man that you both need me to be and to do that I needed to be honest with you about everything" he looked so tired.

"I think your right, we will talk about this again but for now lets just get some rest Edward, we have another long drive ahead of us tomorrow." We went in and laid down in the bed, me on one side, him all the way on the other.

"Goodnight Edward"

"Goodnight Bella"

I laid there and listened as his breathing became slower and he had drifted off to sleep, he rolled to his back and I watched him sleep, his bronze hair shining in the moonlight, I laid down next to him, and went to sleep.

**EPOV**

I didn't want Bella to think that she had to talk to me after my revealing evening. I woke up early and she was next to me, gently snoring I smiled at her small face framed by her dark hair. I reached out and brushed her cheek with my hand, she smiled in her sleep and said my name silently, laying back down I was face to face with her and as much as I wanted to touch her face again I held back, then she rolled over with her back to me and snuggled into me in her sleep, I had to calm my heart down before it woke her up. I placed my arm around her and went back to sleep.

**BPOV**

I was awake but didn't want to open my eyes I was right up against Edward and his arm was around me, my first instinct was to move away, but before I could I realized that I didn't want to, so I closed my eyes and went back to sleep.

When Sydney bounced on us in her usual way, I looked over at Edward who rolled onto his back, Sydney snuggled in between the two of us and he put his arm around her, smiling at me. We had to get up and get going if we were going to make our stop in Oregon.

After a quick breakfast we headed out again, once again stopping in certain places along the way, we didn't have long to drive today and we would be in Forks by dark. I had switched Edward and was driving, it was turning Twilight and he and Sydney had both fallen asleep, I turned the radio station to a pop channel and as Katy Perry's Hot and Cold came on, I started dancing in my seat to the song, it had such a great beat.

When the song was over I turned to see that Edward was awake and watching me, he smiled as I blushed.

"Don't be embarrassed Bella, it is nice to see you let yourself go and have fun" it wasn't much longer and we were in Forks, as well pulled into Charlie's there were no light on, I opened the door and found a note saying that they had went away for a few days and would be back after the weekend.

"Momma can we have another sleepover tonight" Sydney asked. "Sure peanut you and momma will camp out all night"

"Can Daddy camp out too" she asked, Edward not wanting to impose "Princess I think Momma might want some alone time with you" he said.

"No, its fine she wants you to be here and you should be here" I said.

We watched a movie that Sydney had wanted to watch and she fell asleep halfway through it, after Edward carried her upstairs to bed, he came back down and sat next to me.

"Thank you for the last two days, they have been wonderful she is such an amazing child and I know that it's all because she had a wonderful mother" he said.

"Well she gets part of it from you too; she definitely has your brains"

"Are you taking her back to San Francisco?"

"I considered it while we were are they but I know that this is Sydney's home now her family is here, you are here"

"Will you be finding a place around here then, I know you love your parents but I can imagine that they are cramping your dating life" he said.

I laughed, "Yes it is so inconvenient and totally crimping my style"

"What about Jared" boy he was asking all the questions.

"I nicely let him know that we would not be getting back together anytime soon, and just so you know he won't be editing my books anymore, I asked Tanya to find someone else, and yes I will be looking for a place here, I just have to find some time"

"I can help you look if you want" he smiled.

"Ok, that would be great!" I said smiling at him.

I went upstairs to go to sleep, Edward slept downstairs on the couch. He had to work in the morning but offered to look at some houses with me in the afternoon, I drove Sydney over to spend the day with the Cullen's.

Fanfare erupted as we walked in, "Wow, I am going to go away more often, maybe next time we'll get a parade" I joked as they all surrounded us covering us in hugs and kisses.

"Sydney-bear I think you have grown a foot since you left" Emmett said picking her up.

"Not that I am not happy you are all still here, but don't you all have jobs" I asked.

"Well we've been thinking about it for a while now, and we have decided to move back here" Rose said and I cheered and hugged her.

"So now all we have to do is talk Alice and Jasper into coming home and we'll be together again" I said and they all smiled wider.

"Are you staying too Bella" Esme asked smiling excitedly. "Yes, I have decided that Sydney and I need to be with our family" and the hugs started all over again.

"Have you found a place" Rose asked.

"Edward is going to help me look this afternoon" they all shot questioning looks at me.

"During our trip we had a couple breakthroughs, and I am hoping that he will share them with you but it is his story to tell not mine, but we are working on things and he is very good with Sydney"

Emse insisted on making all lunch and I left to go meet Edward, I was half way to town when I heard the noise of a tire blowing out. Moving as far off the road as I could I was digging for my AAA card when a truck pulled up behind me, I saw a young man step out and he was handsome, very well built with dark hair. I got out of my car.

"Do you need some help" he asked in a husky voice, I felt goose bumps raise on my arms.

"Flat Tire" I said turning to face him full on.

"Bella" he asked taking off his sunglasses "Bella Swan"

I knew who he was the minute he said my name.

"It's great to see you again Jacob."

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AN: Now don't boo me, I know Jacob but I do have a soft spot for him.

**Edward confessed all, now maybe we don't hate him quite as much as we did before, REVIEW and let me know.**


	9. Chapter 9

**Thanks again to everyone who is reading this story and reviewing,**

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Chapter 9

Jacob made no time changing my tire, and we got a chance to talk while he worked. He owns a body shop in La Push and had just like everyone else read my books.

"Dad, told me that you were back in town. When are you going to come down and hang out Bella" he asked.

"Well I am going to look at houses today, but maybe Sydney and I can come down tomorrow"

"Who's Sydney, a friend?" I forgot that he didn't know about Sydney.

"Sydney is my daughter" I watched for the reaction most single guys had when hearing about a single mom.

"That's great Bells, I will grill some steaks and we can all hang out" he smiled.

"Sound good Jake, and thanks for helping me with my tire" I said giving him a hug, his strong arms wrapping themselves around me filling me with a feeling of safety.

"Always a pleasure to come to the aid of a beautiful lady" he smiled and my cheeks got red.

I headed out to meet Edward, having already called him to tell him I was running late. I met in at the first house, and while it was ok I was afraid of all the work that it would entail to make it what I wanted. So we moved on to the second house and then the third. I was starting to get discouraged when we came to the fourth house, it was a log A frame home, that set back off of the road, the front and the back yard were both nice and spacious with plenty of room for Sydney to play in.

I spoke with the owners and made and offer I was going to use cash from my last book to purchase the house, so we made an appointment tomorrow to have it appraised and inspected and if they both were in good standing, the house would be ready to move into as soon as the paperwork was complete.

"Alice, Rose and Mom are going to have a field day helping you shop for your house" Edward chuckled at the pained expression on my face at the thought of having to furnish an entire house.

"Well let's go have dinner, my treat as a thank you for helping me today" I said and we headed towards the lodge. We were seated and had ordered our food, after the waitress shamelessly flirted with Edward as usual.

"I thought about seeing if you and Sydney wanted to go to the beach with me tomorrow evening" he asked as we ate our salads.

"Actually Sydney and I have been invited down to the Black's tomorrow for a cook-out,  
I said, Edward looked up at me as I he thought of Jacob.

"As in Jacob Black, when did this come about?"

"I was late today because I had a flat tire, Jacob stopped and fixed it for me, we talked for a few minutes and he invited me and Sydney over for dinner" I tried to make it sound casual.

"Well that sounds like you two will have a fun night then" our steaks had arrived and we ate in silence for a while. I didn't really know what to say to him, should I tell him that nothing is going on with Jacob, it's not right now, but I couldn't exactly put my finger on what I felt when he hugged me earlier. As if Edward could sense my torn emotions.

"Bella, don't worry about it, it's not like we are dating or anything you don't need to worry about explaining anything to me" he said with a small smile.

"How did you know what I thinking" he nailed it on the head.

"I can read you like a book" he laughed. We finished dinner and headed back to his house, Sydney was sleeping when we got there and Esme told me to let her stay, they had enjoyed her all day. I agreed and said I would be back to get her tomorrow. Heading to Renee and Charlie's my mind was full again, here lately it was never empty of thoughts.

When I pulled in there was a truck parked in the driveway, I began to worry since Renee and Charlie were both away until I saw Jake leaned up against it.

"Hey Bells" he said walking over to me.

"Jake, what are you doing here" I saw him look unsure "Not that I am complaining" I didn't want him to feel bad for coming because actually I was happy to see him.

"I haven't been able to get you out of my mind all day, and decided to come over and say hello, see if you wanted to get a late bite to eat."

"I just ate, but if you want to come in we can have some coffee" I unlocked the door and he followed me in. After brewing a pot of decaf I carried a tray in the living room that had some cookies and snacks on it.

"So how did the house hunting go" he asked eating a chocolate chip cookie.

"It went slowly at first but I found a keeper the fourth time" I showed him the pictures I had taken today, and as he leaned in close to me to look at the pictures on my camera, his body touching mine sent a chill through me. I came to a picture of Sydney and stopped.

"Tell me about your daughter" he asked.

"Well she is 6 years old, and my entire world. She's smart and funny and loves to giggle, she's my best friend" I told him, the proud mama that I am.

"6 years old, is she Edwards" he asked.

I nodded and then told him the whole story, he listened, his face changing to reflect certain parts, and then when I was finished he spoke.

"You won't want to hear this Bells, but he was never good enough for you, I wish I had known I would have helped you anyway that I could"

"I know you would have Jake, and Edward had his own demons to deal with, but he is on the right path right now and Sydney loves him"

"Are you two together?" he asked looking at me, waiting for me to answer.

"No we aren't, we are friends right now and I don't know if we will ever be more then that our history is way to painful to forger about right now, but I told him that he could have a chance to be a part of our lives"

"Well in that case, I know that I invited you over tomorrow night but can I take you out one night this week?" he asked hopeful.

I thought about it for a moment, Jake and I had a good relationship when we were together, I was so wrapped up in Edward though that I never gave him a chance really. But right now in this moment I had a feeling that I wouldn't be disappointed saying yes to him.

"On a date" I asked just to be sure.

"Well yes, unless you aren't ready or looking for that right now" he stammered.

"No Jake, I would love to go on a date with you" I smiled. "Do you want to watch a movie, or do you need to get home"

"Nope I am good, can I pick the movie" he asked afraid that I would pick a chick flick.

"Go right ahead" I handed him the remote and he went through the on-demand movies until he found the one he wanted, and turned on Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull. I hopped up and turned the lights off, and sat back on the couch, he moved a little closer to me and wrapped his arm around me, the minute his arm was around me, the tense feelings, the worry and the stress I had been feeling lately melted away, I snuggled into him and we watched the movie.

When it was over, I walked him to the door, he leaned in and placed his hand on my chin, tilting it up to his, he kissed me a slow, burning kiss that made me melt my body into his, he placed his hand on the small of my back holding me closer to him as our kiss continued. We ended the kiss, remembering that we both needed to breathe, I smiled at him and he smiled back at me.

"I will see you tomorrow Bella," he said placing a soft kiss on my lips and then heading for his truck, I was still smiling as I locked the door and headed to bed, excited for the following day.

**EPOV**

I was shocked when Bella told me that she was going to see Jacob tomorrow, I remembered that he was her only serious boyfriend in school. Sydney was fast asleep in my room, when I decided I needed some air. I was in my car and driving before it hit me I was heading to Charlie's.

The strange truck in the driveway caught me off guard, I parked the car on the curb and walked over, I could see through the window as Bella sat talking with a man who could only be Jacob Black, I could tell that she was comfortable with him, and she looked happy.

I went back to my car, sitting there watching her house and feeling a little stalkerish, but I couldn't leave. I needed to know if he was staying the night or whatever was going on. After a while I saw the lights go out but could tell that the TV was on, I drove away and kept driving, my mind going a million different directions.

I had no claims to Bella, especially with our past, but it hurt thinking about her being with him. I drove for a while turning around and heading back towards her, his truck was still in the driveway and the TV was still on. I sat again until I saw lights come on and the door open, I could see them in the doorway, and my breath caught when he kissed her and she kissed him back. I shut my eyes it hurt to watch, but if she wanted to be with him there was nothing I could do about it, I had wasted all my chances years ago. After he got in his truck and left, I headed home. I went to the spare room, and fell into a troubled sleep.

BPOV

I was getting ready to head over to the house to meet with the inspectors, when my phone started ringing.

"Hello" I answered.

"Hello" Edwards familiar voice came through.

"I was just getting ready to head out the door, are you on your way?" I asked grabbing my purse.

"Actually, I got called into the hospital they are down two doctors and needed me, I'm really sorry Bella" he said and he sounded sorry.

"Oh that's ok Edward"

"Mom said to say that Sydney is more then fine there with them while you get the things done that you need to do, ok" he asked and I was grateful that he had arranged someone for Sydney.

"Tell her thanks, and I will call you later, ok"

"Sounds good, Bye Bella" he said ending the phone call.

Crap, I did not want to go over there without Edward, how would I know what needed fixed and if they were going to try and pull something over on me, Charlie would have went if he was home. Then it hit me, I just hoped he was home. I picked up the phone and dialed Jacob's number, begging him to answer.

"Hello" the sound of his voice through the phone made my knees go a little weak.

"Hi Jake, its Bella"

"Hey Bells, you aren't cancelling tonight are you, everyone is excited to see you, and so am I"

"No we are coming, I was just wondering if you were busy right now"

"No, I was just working on some stuff around here, whats' up"

"Well I know its last minute but Edward was supposed to go with me to meet the inspector for the house I want to buy and he got called to the hospital, would you come help me not to get ripped off"

"Of course, I am on my way there as we speak" he said and I heard his truck start up.

He pulled in after me and I hugged him, "Thanks for coming to my rescue again"

"I wouldn't be any where else"

We walked through the house; Jacob was looking at different things, asking all the questions that I didn't think to ask. He also pointed out things that he could fix for me for cost and such.

Jake agreed with everything the inspector had said needed fixed, and I was certain that this was the house that I wanted, so I filled out the papers and started the process, if all went well I would be able to start moving in as soon as the money transferred.

We were heading out, and I was going to go get Sydney when I saw Edward's Volvo pull into the driveway, looking at Jake, I headed over to meet him.

"Hello" he said politeness in his voice as he looked at Jake.

"I didn't think you could come" I asked. "Edward you remember Jacob Black, he was kind enough to come help me with the tour" I said hoping he didn't feel bad for missing it.

"Jacob, it's good to see you again" Edward reached out and shook Jake's hand.

"Bella, I am going to head home I will see you in a little bit" Jake said, leaning down and kissing my cheek, I saw Edward look away as he did this.

"We'll be there as soon as I pick Sydney up" I smiled, he drove away.

"Are you guys dating again" Edward asked his eyes full of pain.

I took a deep breath and let it out, "He has asked me out on a date and I said yes"

"Do you have feelings for him?"

"I do, I can't say what they are as I just saw him yesterday for the first time in six years" I felt bad, but I liked the way that Jacob made me feel.

"Well I need to head back to the hospital I just wanted to make sure that you were ok here, but now that I see that are" he was getting back into his car.

"Edward, don't be upset you and I are not together, and while we are working on a relationship of some sorts we have both discussed that fact that being together as a couple may never be possible with our history."

"Bella, I know I hurt you and I have no right to tell you that I love you after everything that I put you through, but it's the truth, but you are right just because I love you doesn't mean that I am the right guy for you."

"I love you Edward, I always have and part of me always will, but right now are main priority needs to be Sydney, and then our relationship will go from there, but I do like Jacob and I am sorry if that hurts you"

"I just want you to be happy, and if he makes you happy then that's great" he smiled a little smile and backed his car up and out of the driveway. I headed to the Cullen's calling to let them know I would be there shortly and to have Sydney dressed.

"When are we going furniture shopping" Alice pounced before I was in the door.

"As soon as I know everything is a go" I said.

"Momma, I can wait to have my own room can it be purple and gold" Sydney asked after giving me a big smile.

"Purple and gold" I asked looking at Alice.

"Yes Momma, a Hannah Montana room" she said and I smiled.

"If that's what you want, I will make you a deal" I said smiling at my smart little girl.

"What's that"

"If you promise to keep it clean when its done, how would like Auntie Ali, and Auntie Rose to help you make your room extra super special" I said seeing her face light up as well as her Aunts.

"Really" they all three exclaimed and I could see the wheels turning in their heads.

"We can go over to the house soon and you guys can help me decide what to do with it, but we need to get going little lady" I said and we headed off to La Push.

"Where are we going Momma," Sydney asked.

"We are going to a cook-out at Momma's friends Jacob's house and everyone can't wait to meet you" I smiled, hoping that my daughter would like Jake.

We arrived and I was shocked at how much Jake had done to Billy's house, it looked amazing, we walked around to the back and was greeted by all my La Push friends.

Emily, Kim and Leah made over Sydney and she took to them quickly. Jake came over and gave me a small kiss on the cheek, and I introduced him to Sydney.

"It's very nice to meet you, your mommy told me all about you" he smiled at her.

"Mommy is letting my paint my room purple and gold at our new house" she told him all about her Hannah Montana room and he listened to every word she said.

Watching her interact with Jake comforted me, because she had only known Jared and Edward, and if I was going to have a relationship with Jake her opinion mattered to me the most.

We ate and talked with everyone, Sydney loved all the little kids that she got to meet and play with, I knew she missed her friends, as she was playing it gave Jake and I time to talk.

"She is amazing Bella, she is a miniature you, but with coordination" he said laughing at the last part.

"She's my life Jake"

"Was everything ok after I left earlier, Edward seemed shocked to see me" he asked putting his arm around me.

"We talked and he understands, and said that he wants me to be happy"

We talked a bit more about the house and La Push, when Sydney came running over.

"Jake, will you push me on the big swing, please" she smiled and he went off with her and I watched them talking and laughing. We left after it got dark, Jake finalizing our date for the following night.

"So did you have fun Peanut" I asked as drove home.

"I had the best time playing with Sammie, Claire and Brian" she rattled off the kids that were there. "Jake said that he can build me Hannah's Montana's Guitar for my room"

"He did, well that was very nice of him" I said waiting to see if she gave her opinion of Jake.

"Yep, he is going to come look at my room and see how big is can be" she said excitement in her voice. "I like Jake Momma, he is very funny and he can push me super high on the swings"

"I'm glad peanut, Jake is a good friend of Momma's" I said, happy that she liked him.

"He makes you smile and laugh Momma, and I think he likes you. Sammie said that he likes you even though you have cooties" her tone dropped a bit.

"What's wrong peanut" I asked.

"I just worry about Daddy, I don't want him to think that I like Jake more then him momma"

"Daddy would never think that sweetie, he will be happy you made a friend" I told her trying to reassure her.

"Will he be happy that you made a friend too" ok how to answer that one.

"Well Daddy wants Mommy to be happy too" I hoped that would be enough.

She fell asleep a few minutes after that and I put her straight to bed and headed there myself.

I took Sydney over to the house to sign a final form, and she was so excited picking out which room she liked the best and talking about what she wanted and where. I took her over to the Cullen's she was going to stay there over night while I went on my date.

I took her bag upstairs and as I came back down, I was pulled to the couch by Alice and Rose.

"So Bella, what's this about a date with Jacob Black tonight" Rose asked.

"Well he asked me and I said yes"

"Do you like him" Alice asked as if we were back in high school.

"I think I do, he makes me smile and I don't have any worries when I am with him, it feels nice"

"Well he was good for you in high school too, you just were occupied at the time to see how good he was" Alice said.

"You guys aren't upset; I mean I would have thought you would want me with Edward"

"Bella, after everything you guys have been through, if you were to ever be together I couldn't see it happening for a good while, there is too much pain to heal before that will happen" Alice said holding my hands.

"I know, but I hate to see him hurting" I said.

"Bella, he made his own bed years ago, you are allowing him back into your life and into Sydney's life that is more then he could ever had dreamed of" Rose said.

"Come on" Alice said pulling me up. "Where are we going" I asked.

"You have a date, and its been forever since we got to play Bella Barbie with you" and I knew better then to fight.

As they were getting me ready and chit chatting about this and that, we started talking about the house.

"Can you meet me there tomorrow in the afternoon, we can do a walk through and you can help me decided what needs what?" I asked knowing they would say yes.

"Afternoon huh, Bella's planning on getting wild tonight" Rose smiled and laughed as I smacked her arm.

"What you are big girl and big girls have needs to, just don't do anything I wouldn't do" she said.

"So that leaves the field wide open" I laughed, and it was her turn to smack me.

"Stop it Bella" Alice said and I looked at her. "What" I asked.

"Stop feeling bad, Edward can't expect you to be alone forever and you need to have a life, whatever relationship you two have whether it be friends or maybe one day more, right now you need to focus on making you happy." She said and I knew she was right.

When they finished, I did look good so I kissed Sydney good bye and headed to Charlie's where Jake was picking me up, after dressing in skinny jeans and a dark blue cashmere sweater, I heard him knock on the door. Answering it I looked him over, he looked really good in a dark orange polo and dark blue jeans that set off his russet skin tone off nicely.

"Bella you look amazing" he said leaning in and kissing me.

Dinner was wonderful, afterwards we went for a walk back on the pier and then headed home, we curled up on the couch and watched another movie this time my choice and I picked "What Happens is Vegas".

We were snuggling on the sofa him lying behind me, as his hand started rubbing slowly up and down my arm, then he made soft circles on the bare skin of my belly that was peaking out from under my sweater, each touch was like electricity. He leaned in and placed soft kisses on my neck. I turned over and met his lips with my own, my tongue ran across his lower lip asking for entrance and his lips parted. Our kisses became more passionate and his went under my sweater running up and down my back.

My own hand went under his shirt and rubbed across the muscles of his chest; he moaned at my touch and kissed me harder then before. Rolling over so that I was slightly over top of him, he kissed me neck and lips. I leaned down and did the same to him, my name escaped his lips in a whisper.

"Bella"

"Jake, can I ask you something?"

"Anything"

"Will you stay tonight" he looked at me.

"I'm not saying that I am ready for anything to happen besides this, but I don't want you to leave"

"Me either, Bella and I want to keep seeing where we can go from here, are you interested in that too"

"Are you asking me to be your girlfriend Jake" I smiled at the thought.

"Yes I am, will you?"

"I will Jake, now let's go where we can be a bit more comfortable" and he picked me up and carried me to my room.

I changed into PJ's and grabbed him some of Charlie's sweats and a shirt and we continued our make-out session, not going any further for the time being, and we talked more.

"I need to tell you something" I said looking up into his black eyes.

"What Bells"

"I'm sorry for not really giving you a chance the first time we were together, my mind was wrapped around something else, and it wasn't fair to you, and I can't say that I don't have a lot on my plate right now, but I feel something very special for you and I promise that I will not push those feelings aside Jake"

"I know that you were crazy for Edward in school, and that you have had a rough road because of him, you will always be tied to him because of Sydney but I care about you a lot and I believe you when you say that you are in it this time, and I can't wait to show you how special you are"

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AN: Now don't get mad at me for bringing Jacob into the story it just seemed to fit, There isn't anyway that Bella and Edward can just jump into a relationship with everything that has happened, and Bella needs someone to love her right now. She needs to see that life can be happy.

**Please Review!!!**


	10. Chapter 10

**I know, I know mixed feelings on Jacob, but here is what I see. **

**Jacob is someone from her past, and when she met him again she could feel the strength of his presence and thought, here is someone who I won't have to take care of right now she has to tiptoe with the whole Edward/Sydney thing, and with Jared she had to hide the fact that she was successful because he couldn't handle it.**

**Things with Jake, if they go anywhere will go slow, and she will explain to him why she let him spend the night.**

**Thanks for all the reviews, and support.**

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Chapter 10

Bella

I woke up long before Jacob did, and as I lay there thinking about last night and what would happen now. Maybe that was all I would get out of life, one uncomplicated night.

"Good morning" I heard his husky voice.

"Good Morning"

We got up and dressed, and I made pancakes for breakfast. I knew that I would have to have a talk with him.

"Jake about last night" I started and he looked up at me and gave me a half smile.

"What up Bells"

"Last night was really nice, but my life is so complicated right now and I would like to be with you but slowly. I know that I asked you to stay last night and I want to be honest with you about that"

"Ok Bella tell me whatever you need to say, I'll listen"

"Last night I asked you to stay and I was selfish" He started to interrupt me, but I held my hand up.

"No Jake I was, when I met you on the road I could feel your strength and your warmth and it drew me too, you make me feel safe and like you want to take care of me, and I haven't felt that in a long time, for the past six years I have taken care of Sydney and now I feel like I am taking care of Edward because everything with him is so complicated. Sydney is just getting to know her father and while thinks the world of you, I don't want to add more to her plate."

I paused to take a drink of my coffee I needed the caffeine.

"Bella, we can go as slow as you need, I know that you don't want to parade me around in front of Edward and Sydney as your boyfriend, because that would confuse her and possibly hurt him, and although I don't care about him, hurting him would in the end hurt you too and I don't want to hurt you"

Wow he understood everything I had said and was going to say; maybe just maybe this would work out.

"I need to go get in the shower, I am meeting Esme at the house to go over something's, can I call you later" I said after we finished cleaning up the kitchen

He pulled me in for an amazing goodbye kiss, "I can't wait til later" he said as he climbed in his truck and left.

I ran upstairs and jumped in the shower and as I was walking back out into my bedroom, I screamed.

"Edward what the hell are you doing here, trying to scare me to death" I was really glad that I had dressed in the bathroom.

"Sorry Bella" he was trying hard not to laugh, "I came to give you a ride over to your house, if that's ok"

"Um sure, let's go" I grabbed my purse and climbed in his car. "How was Sydney last night"

"She ate entirely too much junk food thanks to Emmett, her toenails are now bright pink thanks to her Aunts, and she was wonderful" he beamed.

"Well the junk food I will have to talk to Emmett about" I laughed.

"She went shopping for stuff her bedroom with Rose and Ali, I hope that's ok I was going to call you" he looked nervous.

"That's fine Edward" We were pulling in the driveway, Esme was already there walking around the house.

"Bella, there are so many possibilities just in the yard alone" she said.

"I was thinking of having a big swing set built in the backyard for her" I said walking up on the porch and opening the door. We spent the next 3 hours going room to room talking about what would be done, I noticed Edwards expression change when I mentioned that Jacob had offered to do the work that needed done if I bought the supplies.

"It's beautiful and we are so happy to have you so close" Esme said giving me a hug.

"Me too, its good to be home, I'll be over to get Sydney in a little bit" I returned the hug.

"Can she stay again, we have so much fun with her and you haven't really ever had a break and time to yourself, please" I could never turn her down.

"Of course, tell her I will call her later"

"I'm starving, do you want to get something to eat" Edward asked. "Unless you already have plans"

"I am hungry, famished actually" I said and my stomach growled confirming it. He laughed.

We went to the little diner on main street, I ordered the chicken and he ordered steak.

"Bella, can I ask you something personal"

"You can ask, I may or may not answer"

"Jacob, how is that going"

"We are dating slowly, I like him" I said eating my salad, this was not comfortable.

"Oh" he said

"Edward, I told you yesterday that I don't want to hurt you but I need some me time"

"Don't get mad, but don't you think that this will confuse Sydney bringing another man into her life."

The words took a minute for me to register and then the anger came.

"The only man she knew as a father until a few months ago was Jared, and even then he was just a father figure. Then she got to meet you and I know that is confusing for her, and I would never just bring Jake over and like, this is mommy's boyfriend let's all go spend time together, and I explained all of this to Jake and he understands"

"I bet he does" Edward was pouting and it was pissing me off.

"Yes he does, and he knows that things are rough with you right now and doesn't want to cause me any added stress, so yes he understands, I'm sorry if you don't, but its my life"

"Well I am part of your life too now"

"Yes Edward I know you are, but right now the roles you are playing is father and friend"

"What if I want to be more then your friend Bella, what if I want to be the one who takes you out on dates and kisses you goodnight or goodbye in the morning"

Well, I knew where most of the attitude was coming from now, he was there when Jake left this morning, and as for being a couple, I couldn't do that right now, the trust wasn't there yet.

"Look I don't want to hurt you, but right now I can't be in a relationship with you, I told you this last night, the trust just isn't there yet, I care about you a lot, I love you more then I should but there can be no us right now. And as for this morning, Jake and I watched a movie last night and we went to sleep, nothing happened, I'm not that kind of woman Edward"

"Well I think that we are at an impasse right now, I want you and you want someone else" he spat.

"Welcome to my world buddy, I wanted you for years and subjected myself to your behavior for years and you made me think that you wanted someone else" I spat back.

"Maybe we just need some time apart, focus on Sydney" he said.

"That's the first intelligent thing you've said all night Edward"

"There's no need to be a bitch Bella" I flinched at the word as he said it and I could tell he regretted it.

"Edward, I think that we should a therapist you and I to work through these issues, because you hurt me very badly and left me high and dry and I don't know if I can process all of this, a professional, outside opinion would be wonderful"

"Are you serious, you want us to see someone?"

"You just called me a bitch, and I think that I have been more then accommodating to you, I let you spend time with your daughter, I am moving here to keep her close to you and your family, and I am trying to be your friend, you want more I get that but right now I can't be more then your friend, so yes I am serious"

"Well then find someone and tell me when and where, are you ready to go home" he asked throwing money down on the table, the drive to my house was short and quiet.

I threw my stuff down on the couch and flopped down next to it, sitting there for a few minutes before my phone rang, I thought it was Edward but then I smiled at the number.

"Hello" I said trying to keep my voice upbeat. But I failed.

"Hey beautiful what's wrong" Jake asked.

"Nothing, I have had a long day"

"Is that all"

"Edward and I got into a small argument, but its fine really"

"Would you like to hang out for a little bit, come down here maybe? Quil's having a bonfire come relax have a beer and forget your day"

I almost said no, and then decided that I did want some fun, some conversation that didn't have to be so dramatic all the time.

"I'll be there in a little bit, I need to call Sydney first, Esme wanted her to stay again" I said hanging up the phone and then dialing it again.

"Hello Rose, how are you"

"Good Bella, what's wrong?" everyone knew me too well.

"Edward and I had a little argument, but its nothing. How is my baby girl"

"She had a great day shopping, she must of inherited it from Alice. She just finished dinner, do you want me to get her"

"Yes Please" and I heard her holler.

"Before she comes, are you sure you're ok"

"It's just everything is so confusing right now and I am trying to do right by everyone, Edwards upset about Jacob"

"You listen to me Bella Swan, you need to be happy whether it's with Jacob, Edward or someone you haven't met yet, don't let anyone tell you otherwise, you have been the giver for so long, now its time to be the taker"

"Thanks Rose, can we do lunch tomorrow me you and Alice, I need some girl time"

"Love too" she said and I heard Sydney come in the room.

"Hey Momma" my angel said in her bubbly voice.

"Hey Peanut, I miss you, are you having fun"

"Oh yes, Auntie Alice and Auntie Rose helped me pick out my…what's that called again Rose" and I heard Rose in the background say "Bedding" "Oh yeah my bedding" and some things to go on the floor, and a bunch of stuff" she laughed as she talked, and I missed her so much.

"Well I am going to come get you tomorrow and we are going to have a special dinner just the two of us at a fancy restaurant"

"Is Daddy coming too" ah, this sucks sometimes I wished I had stayed in San Francisco.

"Sweetie Momma really wants some alone time with you, maybe next time Daddy can come" If she fought me I knew I would give in, but I didn't want to.

"Ok Momma, can I wear a dress" YES I shouted in my head.

"Yes sweetheart you can, I love you"

We hung up and I changed into some warmer clothes and headed off to La Push.

**EPOV**

A therapist she wants us to see a therapist, I can't believe what a mess this is turning into.

I went a bit crazy back there, but I couldn't take it when I saw him leaving her house this morning, all I could think of was when I got to hold her a couple of days ago while she slept, what she looked like when she woke up and now he was in there with her and I was on the outside again.

I would need to fins her and apologize for the way I acted, but I decided to give her the space I told her we needed, my daughter filled me in on her day when I got home, and I was just happy to have her in my life, and I would do anything I needed to keep her here.

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AN: Short I know but I wanted to write today, please review you know I love them.


	11. Chapter 11

**Sorry for the delay, life has been busy around here, but here you go.**

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Chapter 11

I couldn't believe how relaxing it was in La Push with Jake and his friends, we sat around the bonfire and listened as Billy told stories, it was a wonderful evening and I was sad to see it end.

"Do you have plans tomorrow" Jake asked me as we walked to my car, I shook my head yes.

"Sydney and I are going to have a lovely dinner tomorrow just the two of us, she starts school in a few weeks and I want to spend some time with her, it hasn't been just the two of us since she got here"

"I am sure you two will have a great time, call me if you want to tomorrow" he said giving me a big kiss.

"I will call you, thanks for inviting me over I had a very nice time" I climbed in my car and headed home to enjoy my last night of peace, Charlie and Renee would be home tomorrow some time and I needed to get started on the house plans.

Jacob and I had talked about what we would start on first and he was going to get started as soon as he picked up the stuff from Home Depot.

I called the Cullen's to check on Sydney, Rose answered the phone.

"Hey Rose is Sydney still up"

"She just crashed about five minutes ago, Emmett thoroughly wore her out tonight, and he's crashed too" She laughed.

"Ahh, I really wanted to tell her goodnight" I felt down I missed my girl, I wasn't used to sharing her.

"I will have her call you in the morning, so how was your night out" she asked with her knowing tone shining through.

"It was relaxing, we sat around the fire eating and listening to stories"

"I bet it was"

"Are we still on for lunch tomorrow Rose" I asked remembering our date.

"Actually, I spoke with Alice and she and Jasper are having lunch with his parent's tomorrow before they head back to Seattle, can we do the next day" she said.

"Sounds good to me" it didn't take me long to fall asleep after we hung up.

I woke up and worked on my book for a few hours, checking to see if Victoria had sent me any of the other chapter back, and then I started on my errands I needed to get my place in San Francisco packed up and moved up here, but this house was much bigger and I needed more furniture so I was off to Port Angeles to order some of the things we would need.

I walked into the furniture store and was looking at dining room tables when I heard the voice that was nails on a chalk board to me.

"Well if it isn't Bella Swan" I spun around and was face to face with Kate, her eyes shining with hatred.

"Kate" I said walking over to the next table rolling my eyes as she followed me.

"I heard a rumor that you were moving back to town"

"Well you heard right, my daughter and I are moving here" I said with a little smirk at the way her face looked when I mentioned Sydney.

"Edward's daughter, I saw her at the Carnival she's beautiful"

"She is my pride and joy" I really wanted to end this conversation it was going nowhere and I had stuff to do before my dinner with Sydney.

"Are you and Edward together" she asked and we finally were getting to what she wanted.

"Edward and I focusing on our daughter right now, but I am sure he told you all of this when you had coffee not to long ago"

Ha, I had played my cards right; she didn't know that I knew. I smiled as I found the table that I liked.

"Look Kate, I am really busy right now and seeing that we are not friends, have never been friends, and will never be friends I don't really think we need to keep speaking to each other" I said waving the salesman back over.

"You always thought you were better then me Bella, but Edward choose me over you for years, so I guess you were wrong and although he may be your lap dog now give it time he will be back with me again and you will be alone" she said viciously.

"Kate we both know why he was with you, and it wasn't because he loved you, I doubt he ever once told you that he loved you in the years you were together, but yet he tells me all the time, so why don't you march your ugly ass right back to where ever it is you were because we are done here"

I walked over and met the salesmen who had hung back after hearing mine and Kate's exchange, and we moved on to look at a few other things. I left and hour later with my purchases waiting to be shipped.

I arrived at the Cullen's dressed for dinner with my daughter, I had decided on a nice navy blue summer dress. The door opened to show Edward looking like a god as usual.

"Bella you look lovely" he said as he leaned in and kissed my cheek, the spot where his lips were burnt as he pulled away.

"Thank you, how has you day been" I asked as we walked into the living room, I could hear Sydney upstairs laughing with Alice and Rose.

"Well I went into the hospital for a bit and then came back and had lunch with Sydney, it's going to be odd without her here" he said. I nodded.

"I know, I have been missing her too we usually aren't apart from each other but I know she loves being here too"

"Mom's right though Bella you need a break once and a while too, and it's nice having her here. How is the house going"

"Good Jake is picking up the paint and supplies tomorrow and he is going to start painting tomorrow, and I ordered the few pieces of furniture we needed, now I just need to go to San Fran and get my stuff packed and moved up here"

"When are you going to do that" he asked looking me in the eyes, he always did that looked straight into my eyes with his.

"Soon, I want to get settled before Sydney starts school"

"Can I help you, I can get some time off from the hospital and we can fly down and drive back if you tell me when you want to go" he was being very helpful and I knew that I could use all the help I could get.

"Well that would be great, but I can't impose on you like that" I hated keeping him away from work.

"Bella, it's not a problem I want to do it. I will check tomorrow morning when I go in and maybe we can go in a few days"

I smiled at him, he was really something at times, and I had to remind myself that he was my friend.

"Ok, let me know" I said as Sydney came down stairs in a beautiful green dress that matched her eyes.

"Momma" she said jumping into my arms her bronze curls bouncing.

"Peanut you look beautiful, Daddy's going to be in big trouble in a couple years" I laughed and saw him look at Emmett and Jasper.

"Boys, I never thought about that, I am going to have to hire body guards to keep them away from her" he laughed.

"Don't worry Bro, Jasper and I will be right beside you cleaning the shotguns" Emmett said smiling too.

We said our goodbyes and I drove us to Port Angeles we ate at a beautiful Italian restaurant where the waiter Remy waited on us hand and foot treating Sydney like she was a princess. He even took her around and showed her off, telling everyone about her beautiful dress; she laughed and smiled the whole night.

"I love you Baby" I said as we walked back to the car.

"I love you too Momma" she twirled around smiling at me.

"Did you enjoy dinner?"

"Yes, wasn't Remy the best? I can't wait to tell Daddy all about him; maybe he can come next time"

I knew that where Edward was concerned he was her white knight and she loved him very much, I would have to make concessions now when it came to him.

"Yes Daddy can come next time, I am sure he will love it"

Charlie and Renee were home when we got there, and they swept Sydney away the moment we walked in the door, she told them all about her week and her new bedroom and they showered her with presents that had bought her on their trip.

"Baby girl, I am so glad that you are staying here in Forks" Renee told me as we dished up some ice cream.

"Me too Mom, it feels right to be here and Syd loves to be here with her family"

"How are things with Edward" she asked looking at me so she could read my face as I answered her, she always called me an open book.

"Right now we are focusing on Sydney, but he has made it clear he wants to be in my life as well, I just don't know what role I am comfortable with him playing"

"You have always loved him Bella, and you always will but you have to be able to trust him to be with him, so I can understand why you want to take it slow, you guys have a rough past" I nodded as she was talking, my mom knew me too well.

"He wants to help me pack up my things at my old place, but I don't know if that would be stepping on Jake's toes" I was eating a big bite of Whitehouse Cherry with chocolate syrup.

"Jake huh, well I can't say I am not surprised he is quite the catch, and he has always had a soft spot for him" I looked at her with my eye brows raised.

"I am so comfortable with him Mom, its nice to be around him all my worries go away and he tries to take care of me and I haven't had that in so long, with Jared I felt like I was on pins and needles about his feelings after my book became popular and with Edward things are so complicated trying to sort everything out."

"Bella you have to do what is good for you, if Jake makes you happy then be happy. If Edward has your heart then you have to work that out too".

"But how Mom, honestly I think that I will always love Edward and there are times when he looks at me and tells me everything I want to hear and I just want to love him with everything I have, but I can't, how would I just forget everything that has happened"

"You don't forget, but you move on and you live in the present not the past. I know he has hurt you and I don't say that is right and that you should be with him, but if you love him then you can't fight it forever Bella"

"What about Jake, I care about him too" I had missed my Mom, we talked all the time over the phone but there is something about taking to you mom face to face that makes everything better.

"Do you love him" she asked.

"We have only been together a short time, and while I don't now I can't say that it couldn't ever happen"

"Well I can't say it's not complicated but your heart will let you know, who and when"

I went to bed that night my heart as confused as ever.

**EPOV**

I arranged a few days off and Bella and I could leave as soon as she was able to, this trip would be my chance to show her how much I love her and want to be with her.

"Thanks Dad for helping me get this time off, I really want to help Bella" I said as we ate lunch in his office.

"Son, I want to help you any way possible, I know that you love Bella but remember not to push her too fast." He told me and I knew he was right.

"I won't" I needed to call Bella we had arrangements to make.

She picked up on the third ring; I could hear music in the background.

"Hello" I loved her voice.

"Bella, its me are you busy"

"I am just at the house helping paint" she said and I knew she was with him.

"I was able to change my schedule, if you still want my help we can leave as soon as your ready" I heard it get quieter she must have moved outside.

"Really, I would love your help. Mom and Dad practically kicked me out when they heard I was going away for a few days, they are dying to spoil Sydney without me for a bit, if you want to check on flights we can leave as soon as we get one"

"Already did love, we can fly out at 4 this afternoon or early tomorrow morning."

Love, I had called her love and was hoping that she hadn't heard it.

"How about tomorrow morning, I was hoping to get a couple room painted and I want to tell Sydney I am leaving"

"Me too can I come over this evening and see her" I missed my daughter it hadn't even been a day, but it was too long.

"Ok, book it and tomorrow we will be on our way" she sounded happy, I tried to hope it wasn't about Jacob.

That evening I arrived at Charlie's and he was watching the game as usual.

"Edward, come in sit down" he boomed and tossed me a beer.

"Daddy" Sydney yelled and I sat the beer down picking my girl up instead. "Bella" I said smiling at her.

She smiled back at me, as Renee walked in "Have you eaten" she asked sitting down next to Charlie.

"I have thank you, I was going to see if my girls wanted to go for a walk, maybe get an Ice Cream Cone" I had slipped again but it didn't seem like anyone had noticed so I kept on going.

"Yes" Sydney yelled, and we headed out, her in between Bella and me holding both of our hands. We had our ice cream and walked back home, my daughter's chatter filled the entire trip and I enjoyed every moment of it. After tucking her in, Bella and I went downstairs; she made me a bed on the sofa as we were flying out early it had just made sense for me to stay.

**BPOV**

We were on the airplane drinking orange juice and I was trying to not think about Edward sitting next to me, yesterday he had called me love, and his girl and each time my heart had leapt.

Jacob tried to act like Edward and I going away for a few days didn't bother him, but I knew it did and as much as I cared about him, part of me was secretly looking forward to this alone time with Edward.

We landed and grabbed the rental car; the moving company had brought boxes off and would be over to load them up in the truck as soon as we called them. We worked all day packing up what would be going. We stopped around six and decided to get something to eat.

"I loved that wharf place we went to can we go back there again" he asked looking very handsome in dark jeans and a cream colored shirt.

"Well maybe I will treat you there for lunch, I actually have another place in mind for tonight" I said and we headed out to the little Jazz club that I loved.

After we ate he asked me to dance, there on the dance floor in the near darkness his body pressed against mine, and I closed my eyes as our bodies moved to the music. His heat was very obvious through my light dress and his hands were resting on my lower back, I don't know if it was the music or the place but I wanted to turn my head up I knew that would be all it would take and his lips would find mine. The song ended breaking me out of my Edward trance and I looked up at him and his eyes reflected back my longing and want that had to be showing in mine.

"I think we should go home Bella" he said in almost a whisper and I nodded afraid that my voice would give me away. He reached over and took my hand and we made our way to the car, he drove back taking my hand once again as we were in the car.

The next morning, I awoke to the delicious smell of coffee and cinnamon. Walking out I saw Edward holding a box from my favorite bakery.

"Well that sight alone is enough to make any woman go weak in the knees" I said walking over grabbing plates. We ate and talked a bit neither of us mentioning the night before, maybe I had imagined it all.

We worked through the day again and we would be done in another day if we kept working like this.

I was packing up Sydney's room, when he walked in holding my phone.

"Sorry it was ringing, so I answered it" he looked a little down.

"That's fine" I said not sure about the long face and then I saw the ID, it was Jake.

"Hey Bells, I thought I would call you"

"Sorry Jake, we've been busy or I would have called" I said feeling bad about forgetting about him, because I had.

"How's it going" this was awkward.

"It's going good, we are making good progress"

"How are things with him" oh boy, this was not fun.

"Good, we are getting along well" vagueness was my friend.

"What have you been up to" he was looking for info.

"Well packing, I have more stuff then I thought I did it taking forever, we only stop for meals, last night we ate at my favorite Jazz club"

"Bella, I can't pretend I am comfortable having you there with him"

"Jake, don't do this please. He is in my life you know that"

"I do know that Bella, but why does he have to be there with you alone"

I knew that this trip wasn't going to go over well, and I hated where it was going to go but it wasn't fair to him.

"Look Jake, I think that it would be best if we went back to friends that dated until everything gets settled, I hate that you are hurting right now, and its not fair to you" I didn't want to hurt him

"Your right, but I am not giving up on us just so you know" he said and I knew he wouldn't.

"I know" we hung up and I was feeling pretty down about it.

"Come on, let's go eat my treat tonight" Edward said breaking into my thoughts, we both showered and got changed, and headed out.

"Where are we going" I asked as he headed out.

"Well I spoke to the lady at the bakery this morning and she gave me some ideas on places to go, and I wanted to take you some where special tonight" he said smiling that smile that I loved.

We headed to dinner it was a beautiful French restaurant, we sat at a little table outside.

"It's none of my business but your call didn't sound happy today, is everything ok" he asked me.

"Starting something with Jake wasn't the best idea" I said sipping my cocktail.

"Why not, I thought you liked him"

"I do, but its complicated, but I guess love is always complicated" the waiter brought me another drink and I smiled at the liquid courage.

"Do you love him" his eyes were sad.

"No, but it's not fair to lead him on if I am not going to be with him in the long run"

"If you don't see a future with him, then what do you see"

"Edward, I know what I want, I just don't know how to make it happen"

Luckily the food came and I didn't have to answer, after a sinfully delicious meal we headed off to another Edward picked spot.

We headed to a club, one that I had never been to but I knew that most people went to for Karaoke, I could sing but I wasn't the best in my eyes. We found a little booth and Edward went to get some drinks, he came back and we listened as the different singers went up and sang songs of all sorts. Then Edward stood up, I looked at him.

"Where are you going" I asked.

"It's my turn" he said heading up to the stage as I watched him, not really knowing what was going on.

The spotlight hit him and he looked gorgeous, the women in the club were practically drooling in their seats. The music started and his voice was smooth and perfect.

_You wanna know where we go from here  
So many roads, but none that seen clear.  
Is what we have enough to last a whole life through  
Who knows? baby who knows?_

So you're asking me what do we do  
Cuz time moves so fast and the chances seem so few  
Is it too much to think that we could have it all?  
Who knows? We may never know.

But if I were you, Id promise to live life for all its worth  
Take all that you've been given  
And leave your mark upon this earth  
Trust your heart to show you everything you'll ever need  
And if I were you, Id fall in love with me.

So hold me close, Ill kiss away your fears.  
I won't promise the moon, but I promise to be here.  
And what if together it gets better every day  
Who knows? baby who knows?

But if I were you, Id promise to live life for all its worth  
Take all that you've been given  
And leave your mark upon this earth  
Trust your heart to show you everything you'll ever need  
And if I were you, Id fall in love with me.

**(If I were you – Collin Raye)**

I listened as he sung and his words hit me hard, how badly I wanted to believe him. God I wanted to so badly that it hurt. Applause broke out and he walked back to me, looking at me his eyes searching mine.

"Edward, that was beautiful"

"I wanted to tell you all the things that I want to say to you, and I want you to believe them Bella, because I love you"

After he said that he leaned over and kissed me, the noisy club was gone, the music the people there was nothing but Edward and me, his lips on mine electricity going through my body; I opened my mouth and let him kiss me more, melting my body against his.

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AN: Ok…so I love that song, you should hear it, it truly is beautiful.

**A lot of fluff but next chapter will be packed with some angst and drama.**

**REVIEW PLEASE…**


	12. Chapter 12

**Sorry for the time between updates, I have been working on finishing my other Story A Moment In Time – an Emmett and Bella Story.**

**Please Review.**

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Chapter 12

The kiss was electrifying, my mind was screaming for me to pull away to stop before it was too late, but my heart and my lips just wanted to keep going. When we finally broke apart for air, his green eyes were smoldering while looking into my own.

"I'm sorry if that was to forward of me, but I've been dying to do it for month" he admitted. The confusion and the worry that had went away when his hot lips were on mine, was slowly creeping back.

"It's ok Edward, it was nice" I didn't want to lie to him, and that made him smile. We sat and listened to a couple more songs.

"Shall we go" he said into my ear, causing goose bumps to rise, I nodded and he stood up and took my hand helping me up, but he didn't let go of my hand when we were up. Instead he held it as he led me through the club, and out into the car. The ride home was a silent one, which was nice because my head was swimming with thoughts and emotions.

It would be so simple to have something with Edward, the feelings were there on both sides, I enjoyed myself when we were together, Sydney loved and adored him, but the biggest thing holding me back was the history, what if he hurt me again.

I was jolted out of my thoughts when we stopped and he turned the car off, he came around and opened my door and we walked into my dark almost empty house.

"Are you tired, or do you want to watch something" he asked.

"Sure, you pick I am going to go get out of these heels" I said and headed back the hallway, I was pulling on my PJ's when I heard a knock, opening the door he was standing there in pajama pants and a black wife beater, I held the drool in as he held up the movie.

"We packed up the DVD player in the living room" he said and I remembered the only one left was in here.

"Edward, are you trying to get in my bed" I asked, my voice coming out a little flirtier then I had planned on it being, I chuckled as his cheeks reddened a bit.

"We match" he said pointing to his cheeks, which were red like mine. Laughing I pointed him to the bed. This wasn't a big deal; we had slept in the same bed when we had the road trip with Sydney.

I looked at him as the movie began and his face went pale, "Oh shit Bella I'm sorry let me get something else" he went to jump up, but I grabbed his arm.

"Interview with a vampire is fine Edward" remembering the first time we watched it together starting our rollercoaster relationship.

"Are you sure, I just grabbed it and wasn't thinking"

"Obviously I am ok with the movie, if I own it" I laughed and he calmed down and settled back against the headboard next to me.

**EPOV**

The evening went beautifully; her eyes never left me as I sung to her. I had heard the song on the radio and knew that somehow I wanted Bella to hear it, and when I asked the baker about local hotspots he had mentioned the karaoke bar.

Kissing her was something that I hadn't planned, but I couldn't be happier that it happened, when her body moved next to mine I knew that she was ok with it, and I relished every second of the kiss. I left her to think in the car, because I knew that was what she was doing, but when we got home I didn't want to end the night, and while she was changing I changed and grabbed a movie; most of them I had seen before, so I just eenie, meenie, minie, moed and choose one.

Sitting there next to her watching the movie that had started the beginning of us was hard, I wanted so bad to reach over and hold her hand; hell I just wanted to hold her, touch her.

Finally just deciding to go for it, I reached over and took her small hand into mine, she looked at me her brown eyes questioning me, and then she turned back to the movie, after a while I pulled her hand over onto my leg and moved in close to her, her head came to rest on my arm, and I rubbed small circles on her arm.

She drifted off to sleep in the last half hour of the movie, so I laid her down and turned off the movie, getting ready to slide off the bed, her hand held mine tighter so I stayed. Watching her sleep, my eyes were starting to close when I heard her almost whisper.

"Edward" I thought she was awake, but her eyes were stI'll closed; she was talking in her sleep.

"So confused" she said and then she mumbled something else before she said something that made my heart stop.

"But I do love you"

Laying back down, I fell asleep instantly.

**BPOV**

My dreams were riddled with Edward, and when I opened my eyes I was shocked to find my arm and leg draped over him, he was smiling in his sleep. I tried to move off of him, but his eyes flew open, and he pulled me back to him rolling to face me, securing me in his arms.

"Hi" I said sheepishly.

"Did you sleep well" he asked.

"Yes quite well, you?" I asked.

"After you stopped talking" he chuckled, and my eyes went wide.

"What did I say" I asked burying my head into the pI'llow, he laughed.

"Was it that bad" I unburied my head a bit.

"I don't think so, it was interesting" he said.

"How interesting"

"Would you like to tell me what you are confused about Bella" he asked, and I groaned thinking of my dream where we were discussing our feelings for each other.

"How about we talk over breakfast" I stalled, he jumped up.

"I wI'll go pick something up, and be right back" he said and a few minutes later I heard the door shut, getting up and getting dressed myself, I was brushing my hair when I heard the doorbell.

"Did you forget the Key" I said opening the door, and not seeing Edward.

"Hello Bella" Jared said.

"What are you doing here" I asked.

"Can we talk" he asked, and although I didn't want him here when Edward came back I agreed.

"Talk"

"What are you here with him" he asked.

"I don't see where it's any of your business but he is helping me pack things up, I am moving home" I said.

"So even after everything he did you are going to take him back"

"So what if I am, he's not the same person he was then Jared" I growled.

"Take me back instead Bella, love me like you should have when we were together" he said anger in his tone.

"I think you need to leave now" I said as my phone rang. "It's Sydney I need to take this" I said walking back to my room.

**EPOV**

She loves me, she might not be able to tell me now but now I know I have a fighting chance.

I was carrying coffee and éclairs as I came in the house, I stopped when I saw a man standing there.

"Who are you" I asked setting the stuff down.

"Jared" he said.

"What are you doing here" I asked looking for Bella.

"Bella's getting changed, we are going to lunch and talk about things" he said and my heart stopped.

"When did this come about" I asked confused.

"I heard she was in town and I asked for another chance and she agreed to talk about it" he said smugly.

"Well then don't let me intrude" I said and walked back out the door.

I headed out to the pier to think about everything, this just couldn't be happening, not when I thought everything was going so well.

BPOV

Sydney was enjoying fishing with Pappy Charlie, and Uncle BI'lly. I walked out glancing at the clock, Edward should have been back by now.

"Jared, there is nothing left for us to talk about, I think you need to leave" I said.

He crossed his arms over his chest, "Not until we talk Bella"

I looked over and saw two coffees and a box sitting on the table. "Where is Edward" I said not holding my anger back.

"I told him that you and I were talking about fixing things and he left." He said, I slapped him across the face.

"Why the hell would you do something like that, you have no right to interfere with my life anymore, now please leave so I can find Edward" I shouted, and he didn't move so I grabbed my stuff and headed out the door.

I tried calling his phone but it went to voicemail, so I tried again. I had no clue where to look first, so I just went to the obvious places, when I ran out of places on foot, I grabbed a cab, after rattling off my destination I sat back thinking, this morning I was going to tell him that I had feelings for him, I couldn't deny them anymore, and as much as I didn't want him to hurt me again I was wI'lling to give things a try.

I tried calling him again, this time leaving him a message.

"Edward please call me back, it was all a misunderstanding" as I hung up I heard the song on the radio, it was The Pretenders and I had always loved it.

I decided to text him, with an idea.

EPOV

My phone was ringing every 5 minutes, I just ignored them, didn't listen to the voicemail. I just sat and looked at the water and walked around for hours, finally I decided to look at my phone. Bella had called me 12 times, and there was one voicemail and a text.

_To: Edward_

_From: Bella_

_Please Edward talk to me, this morning wasn't what it looked like. Please meet me tonight at "The Note" at 7pm, please._

I looked at my watch it was after five already, the day had flown by. I decided to go and meet her, if only to tell her that I was heading home and would see her when she came back.

I stopped at one of the shops on the wharf and bought an outfit appropriate for the club, and walked in just before 7, the hostess led me to the booth that Bella and I had shared last night.

"Ok, guys and gals we are going to get the evening started, let me introduce the lovely Miss Bella" the DJ said and I sat up straighter, Bella was going to sing.

She looked over at me, and smiled at me as the music started.

_Oh, why you look so sad?  
Tears are in your eyes  
Come on and come to me now  
Don't be ashamed to cry  
Let me see you through  
cause I've seen the dark side too  
When the night falls on you  
You don't know what to do  
Nothing you confess  
Could make me love you less_

I'll stand by you  
I'll stand by you  
Wont let nobody hurt you  
I'll stand by you

So if you're mad, get mad  
Don't hold it all inside  
Come on and talk to me now  
Hey, what you got to hide?  
I get angry too  
Well I'm a lot like you  
When you're standing at the crossroads  
And don't know which path to choose  
Let me come along  
cause even if you're wrong

I'll stand by you  
I'll stand by you  
Wont let nobody hurt you  
I'll stand by you  
Take me in, into your darkest hour  
And I'll never desert you  
I'll stand by you

And when...  
When the night falls on you, baby  
You're feeling all alone  
You wont be on your own

I'll stand by you  
I'll stand by you  
Wont let nobody hurt you

I'll stand by you  
Take me in, into your darkest hour  
And I'll never desert you  
I'll stand by you  
I'll stand by you  
Wont let nobody hurt you  
I'll stand by you  
Wont let nobody hurt you  
I'll stand by you

**(I'll Stand By You – The Pretenders)**

Everyone applauded and cheered as she left the stage, and came over to me. This is what she must have felt last night, because my whole being had been rocked.

"Can we talk" she asked, and I nodded.

"Come on let's go where we can hear ourselves" she said and led me to the car, she got in the drivers seat and headed out of town, when we stopped we could see the lights of the city.

"This is one of my favorite spots at night" she said and we got out of the car, I could see the bay and there was a light breeze.

"Edward, I don't know what all was said to you this morning, but please don't believe any of it, Jared was just trying to hurt you, and if you give me a chance I will tell you everything you wanted to know this morning" she said turning to look at me, I nodded and she spread out a blanket from the back of the car and we sat down.

"What are you confused about Bella" I asked, same as I had this morning.

"I have all these feelings and they are confusing to me" she said, she was fidgeting, so I took her hands in mine.

"What feelings"

"There are moments Edward, when I know that we could be together and things would be great, but then I get scared because I can't go through the hurt that I went through before" she said, and I squeezed her hands tightly in mine.

"It's not like we have to run off tomorrow and get married, if you give me a chance to love you, and if you would love me then we could go as slow as you need" I said.

"I" she started and stopped, maybe I was wrong, maybe she didn't love me. I let go of her hands.

"Edward wait, don't pull away from me"

"Bella, I made mistakes in my past but I am not that person now and if you can't see that then maybe I should just leave you alone, I don't want to confuse you anymore, but I know how I feel about you and there are times when I think that you feel the same" I told her tired of the baby steps.

"Today, when I couldn't find you and I was worried that you had left town, left me I realized just how important you are in my life Edward"

"How important" I asked.

"Edward, today when you were missing I was lost without you, last night when we came home and were together I felt whole, I feel completed with you"

"Part of me thinks that you want to be with me Bella because we have a daughter" I said.

"We could raise our daughter together without being together, I would never just be with you because of Sydney, if I am with you then I am with you because I want to be"

"Ok Bella, I am going to ask you again, what do you want?"

"You Edward, I want you in my life"

"As your friend, as the father of your child, because I love you Bella and I want you in my life as my soul mate and one day as my wife, but if you don't feel the same or will never feel the same then I need to know" I asked, I had to know what my boundaries where.

"I love you Edward" she said, and I swear fireworks went off over my head.

"But I can't help but be scared" she finished.

"I am here for you forever, just tell me what I need to do to show you that, to make you feel my love"

"That's a great song" she said, and I just looked at her. "Oh come on you know that song"

"_When the rain is blowing in your face  
And the whole world is on your case  
I would offer you a warm embrace  
To make you feel my love"_

She sang and I remembered it then so I sang the verse I thought fit.

"_I know you haven't made your mind up yet  
But I would never do you wrong  
I've known it from the moment that we met  
No doubt in my mind where you belong"_

"Everything in life has a song to go with it" she said smiling at me, her smile was radiant and I knew at that moment that we were going to be together.

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AN: They have fallen in love, some of my readers might not be happy with that, and its not going to be an easy road for them, they have a lot to work through but they love each other, and don't want to deny it any more.

**The last song was To Make You Feel My Love – Garth Brooks. **

**Review!!!!**


	13. Chapter 13

**Sorry for the long wait, this is a short chapter but it will start the beginning of their relationship back in forks.**

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Chapter 13

EPOV

It took us another day to finish packing up Bella's apartment, but it was some of the best hours of my life. We talked, and as she told me more stories about our daughter, I couldn't help but smile at the bright future that I was seeing ahead of me.

We were driving back to Forks in our rental car, the packing company would arrive a day after we did. She was fidgeting around as we got closer to Seattle.

"What's wrong love" I asked.

"Nothing really, I'm just anxious to get back home; I hate being away from Syd this long" she said but I felt that there was something more behind it, so I just watched her out of the corner of my eye, hoping that she wasn't changing her mind about being a couple. I had never felt more complete then I was feeling at the moment.

It was just after six when we arrived to Charlie and Renee's, we heard the laughter of a little girl as we walked around to the back of the little white house of Bella's childhood.

"Momma, Daddy" Sydney yelled as she ran to us from her can of tag she was playing with her grandfather, Charlie looked at me as we stopped and I placed my hand on the small of Bella's back.

"Hey Baby Girl" Bella said sweeping her up, and we both hugged her. "I think you've grown a foot since we left, what's Grandma been feeding you" and Sydney laughed as Bella tickled her belly.

"Hi Daddy, come see my castle I built" and we were off to the sandbox, "I think you have a career in architecture Princess" and she smiled as we started building her kingdom.

I stayed until my princess was bathed and tucked into her bed, after saying a pleasant goodnight to Bella, I was enjoying the warm night air.

"Can I have a word with you son" Charlie said snapping me out of my own little world.

"Sure Sir" I said walking over to him.

"I couldn't help but notice there was something between you and Bella tonight" he said, Charlie was never one for long in-depth talks but I was expecting this one.

"Yes sir, Bella and I are dating" I held back the huge smile that wanted to make it's way on to my face.

"I am sure that you have already heard all the warnings about hurting her again, or hurting Sydney; so I'm not going to repeat them. But I haven't forgotten the daughter that I had all those years ago when she a shell of the girl that was once full of life and laughter, when I had to watch her hurt and cry over you. But I will not sit back and let them hurt again, you have one shot at this Edward; do not screw it up this time" and he walked into the house and didn't give me a chance to respond.

He was right and didn't I know it I have one chance to make this work, to prove to my family, Bella's family and most importantly to her and our daughter that I was forever.

BPOV

Things with Edward were very nice and he had agreed to go at my pace, but watching him with Sydney made me wonder why I had any hesitations about being with him; not that we were anywhere close to running away to Vegas; but I loved him and I always had.

He had sensed my reservations on the way home, but I didn't want to tell him that I was afraid to come home and deal with everyone's opinions and feelings; while most would be happy I knew there would be some that would not be.

Opening the door to my new home; I marveled in the changes that had been made while we were gone, the minor things that needed fixed where done the walls were painted and the new carpet was down. My heart began to beat faster as I thought of the new life I would have here; a fresh start with Sydney and Edward. I was brought out of my daydreams by the door closing.

"You're back" the deep familiar voice said and as I turned around I felt guilty over my happy thoughts, I hadn't thought about Jacob Black once since I left.

"Hey Jake, the place looks great, have you slept at all?" I asked keeping my tone light.

"I wanted it to be ready when you got back, how was your trip"

"It was interesting, but productive the movers will be here later today" I said walking into the kitchen the stainless steel appliances had been installed, which made me smile.

"So would you like to have dinner tonight" he asked, but he looked like he already knew the answer.

"Jake, I'm sorry but I can't"

"Edward" he asked

"We're together yes" I felt bad for hurting him "I'm sorry Jake"

"Hey I knew it was only a matter of time, but I'm always here for you" he said as he turned around and headed out of the house.

I finished my walk through stopping at the bright blur that was my daughter's room, taking my cell phone out of my pocket the cheery voice that answered made me laugh.

"Hey Alice" I said

"Bella, your back" she chirped.

"Yes, we got back last night"

"So you and Edward will be over later to tell us all the big news" she said, ever knowing.

"How did you, never mind" there was no point in arguing with Alice.

"Alice, I am my house and I just walked into a purple, pink and gold palace, what happened to keeping it tame"

"I know we went a little overboard, but Sydney loves it Bella and when the custom bedding comes in, you will see how well it all goes together."

"Custom bedding" why was I even bothering fighting with her.

"Well nothing matched" she said and I could see her pouting.

"I bet it will be beautiful Alice" and I could hear her celebrating her win.

"Ok well I will see you later tonight" I said hanging up.

I was out in the backyard looking at the stuff for Sydney swing set when the moving truck pulled in, I did a little happy dance. Running around the front I was showing them where to put the different boxes when two strong arms wrapped around my waist.

"Hello beautiful" his breath on my neck made me shiver, his intoxicating smell caused my knees to go weak, I spun around to face him and he pulled me into a heart stopping kiss, only breaking apart when I ran out of oxygen.

"Hello to you to" I smiled.

"I've missed you" he said and my heart melted, I tried to tell myself to stop, This wasn't how slow worked.

"Me too" and he smiled at me again and we headed into the house.

"Wow, it looks amazing" he said looking around.

"Yes, Jake did a wonderful job" I felt him tense at Jake's name; seriously he wasn't going to get jealous now was he.

"Is he finished?"

"I believe so; he was here earlier to pick up his tools and such"

He just nodded, "The stuff for Syd's swing set was delivered, Emmett will be excited" I said hoping to get off of the Jacob subject.

We walked out back and he looked around the pile of wood and plastic, but I could tell he was holding something in.

"Tell me what's wrong Edward"

"Was the reason that you were so quiet on the way home because you still have feeling for Jacob" he asked.

"No Edward, I was just ready to come home, to have a fresh start here with Sydney; and with you" I said looping my arms around his waist and looking up at him.

"Does he know we are together" he asked and I knew he wasn't going to be happy until I told him.

"Yes, he asked me to go to dinner and I told him that I could not because you and I are together" and he smiled at me, his dazzling smile.

"Good" he said and left it at that, I knew that he was unsure of our relationship the same as I was, but hopefully these worries and fears will go away soon for the both of us.

"Come and see what your sister did to Sydney's room" and I took him the purple palace.

After the movers had unloaded all the boxes and furniture, we headed over to Charlie's and picked Sydney up and headed to the Cullen's.

"There's my girl" Esme said as Sydney ran to her, "Hello Bella" she hugged me as we joined everyone over at the BBQ pit.

"The movers get everything delivered" Carlisle asked as we sat down to eat.

"Yes, now I just have to unpack everything, but it shouldn't take more then a week" everyone chucked.

"Well it will definitely go a lot quicker with help" Edward said smiling at me again, the family had to know by now just by the way he was acting towards me.

"Well I will be there, you just say when" Esme said eating her salad.

"You have done so much all ready, the place looks amazing"

"Yes even the room where Barney was slaughtered" Edward joked, and Rose threw a cherry tomato at him, Jasper and Emmett laughed.

"I love my room Daddy" Sydney said defending her Aunts, and that put an end to the room bashing, Alice just smirked at him.

"So Bells did Eddie here behave himself in San Fran" Emmett asked.

"He was a perfect gentleman, he even sang some Karaoke with me" I said and Edward glared at me and then smiled.

"Really, Edward did you bust out a little Elvis" Jasper said chuckling.

Uh oh, he was not going to be happy with them teasing him; I needed to do damage control and quick.

"He did great, he had all the ladies throwing themselves at him" I said and he smiled at me.

"No Bella was the star, there was not a guy in the place who wasn't ready to take her home" he said and he squeezed my hand.

"So when are you two going to stop pretending and tell us officially that you are together" Alice said ever so not gently.

"Bella and I are officially together" Edward said and he smiled at Sydney and me.

We had talked with Syd last night and she was very happy that her mommy and daddy were together; I hoped and prayed that the happiness would last forever.

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AN: Thanks for reading; I will post another chapter with more in the next few days.


	14. AN: She's Gone

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**Author's Note!**

**Reposting**

**SHE'S GONE!!!!**

**Don't Flip My Bitch Switch has been removed from Fanfiction!!! Thank you everyone who protested this person's vile comments. I'm impressed with FanFiction seeing how quickly they responded to this.**

**LOVE Y'ALL!**

**Liz**


	15. Chapter 15

**Woohoo I loved the reviews…I apologize for the lapse once again life has just been to busy to sit down and write more then a sentence. But it is calming down a bit and now I am back.**

**This Chapter will contain the first Lemon of the story!!**

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Chapter 14

**BPOV**

"Bye Momma, Bye Daddy, I love you" Sydney said as she ran into school it was he first day of kindergarten.

"You ok" Edward asked me as I wiped my eyes. I smiled up at him and nodded.

"Our Baby is growing up" I said as we walked back to his Volvo. My Mom would be her kindergarten teacher so that was comforting and Sydney made friends so easily I had no fears of her not liking school.

The last month with Edward had been wonderful, I loved him with every fiber of me; that had come easy, the hardest part was letting go of my fears of the past repeating itself and enjoy the life we had now.

We were heading back to my house; I wanted to have a talk with Edward while Syd was in school. The renovations were done and I love my house it was everything I could have wanted, only one thing was missing.

We walked out to the bad and sat on the porch swing, no time like the present.

"Edward" I asked and by the tone of my voice he looked at me puzzled.

"Yes love"

"Well the last month has been wonderful to say the least and I have been thinking about the future of our family a lot" I started and with that I had his full attention.

"What's going on Bella"

"Well you've been here a lot lately spending all your free time with me and Sydney"

"Do you not want me too, I'm sorry if I am not giving you any alone time I can cut back a bit" he said and he was sad.

"No Edward, please let me finish, what I was trying to say is; you are here all the time and Sydney and I both love having you here, when you aren't here we miss you terribly; what I want to know is will you come home and live here with us"

**EPOV**

"Will you come home and live with us" home, Bella called this my home, at first I was afraid she was going to ask me to stop spending so much time here, but that's not it, she wants me here more often. We had been taking things very slowly; getting to know each other again, loving Sydney. We had made out almost to the point where I thought I was going to combust, and had been taking a lot of cold showers. So her asking me to move in was like Whoa!

"Really" I asked and she nodded.

"Edward, I am ready to take our relationship to another level; I love you and I don't want to be without you anymore" she said and I kissed her letting her feel my love for her and she climbed on my lap, wrapping her arms around me neck.

She kissed down my neck and back up, she was an expert at turning me on; when he hit my ear with her tongue I pulled her into me as close as she could get and I knew she could feel me pressing against her, a small moan escaped her and she grinded her hips into me.

Finding the hem of her shirt, I slid my hand under it and caressed my hand up her side feeling her soft skin; moving the cup of her bra down her soft breast was in my hand, kneading it gently and firmly she rocked her hips into me and I flicked my thumb over her nipple causing her to rock again.

In one movement she pulled her shirt off, and was taking mine off also. I watched her even thought it was a warm September morning Goosebumps were visible on her arms and I rubbed them to warm her, her hands had found my chest and I looked at her she was radiant in the sunlight. I reached up and unhooked her bra, tossing it aside and taking a good look at her stunning body, she was perfect in everyway.

I pulled her in for a kiss and rubbed my hands down her soft back causing her to shiver, my hands once again found her breasts and this time I needed more of her, kissing down her neck I didn't stop until my tongue had found her nipple, she gasped as I sucked it into my mouth gently nipping and licking it.

"Edward" she moaned and I was grateful that we did not have neighbors. I found the button of her shorts and undid them sliding them off of her as I held her up, in a flash mine were gone to; there we stood in our underwear her legs wrapped around my waist.

I turned and placed her against wall, and continued my attack on her breasts. Her body moved against mine, and I wanted her then and now.

"Edward, I need you" she said as though she was reading my mind. I moved us into the house not wanting our first but second time together to be on the back porch, although I would have her there in the future.

Carrying her with stealth speed to the bedroom, we collapsed onto the bed with her underneath me I pulled her panties off, caressing her thighs and her legs savoring every part of her, starting at her ankle I kissed my way down her leg, stopping at her thigh, my finger brushed over her folds and she was as ready as I was, slipping it inside she moaned, sliding another in I was enjoying watching her buck and move with me. My tongue found her and it wasn't long until she was releasing her sweetness into me.

Her hands that had wound into my hair pulled me up to her and her face was wild with desire and want as she kissed me, her hand worked its way down my body and the feel of her small hand wrapped around me I need her now.

"Bella, I need in you" I begged and pulled her on top of me sliding into her moaning at her tightness as she rocked her body with mine, flipping her over so I was on top her seeing her beneath me her hair flared out around her, she rocked her hips up to me and when I was fully seated inside of her, she begged me to move faster.

Our bodies moved together, and we were kissing and needing more of each other. "Bella love come with me" and she did, we laid there in pure bliss when it hit me.

"Bella, we didn't use protection" I said quickly.

"Edward, I am on the pill; no worries" and I wasn't worried, the thought of more children with Bella was a dream of mine.

"I'll be right back" I said jumping up and running downstairs. Finding my cell phone in my pants on the porch I dialed Esme.

"Hello mom" I said when she answered in her cheerful voice.

"Edward Hello"

"Can you pick Sydney up for school and we will meet you at your house for dinner later" I asked needing more time with Bella.

"Of course son, see you later" I knew she knew but I didn't care.

"Good thinking" Bella said from behind me, and I carried her back upstairs where we spent the afternoon celebrating my moving in.

**BPOV**

Making love with Edward was mind blowing; I couldn't wait to have him again and again, which made me even happier he was moving in.

We arrived at dinner and I knew the world could tell by the looks on our faces that we had made love all afternoon but I didn't care. I felt like a teenager again and would have jumped in the car if it hadn't been broad daylight.

Seeing Sydney I felt guilty about not picking her up from her first day of school, she on the other hand looked like she didn't care the least.

Esme had made an amazing meal, and when the chocolate cake to celebrate Sydney's first day of school was finished, Edward tapped his glass.

"Today Bella asked me to come and live with her and Sydney and I gladly accepted" he said smiling at me.

"It looks like he accepted all afternoon" Emmett said and I felt my cheeks blush bright red, Rose smacked him and everyone laughed.

After dinner and 2 games of Guitar Hero, we carried a sleeping Sydney into our house and after tucking her into bed, Edward and I climbed into our bed and laying in his arms I fell fast sleep.

Sometime in the night, I felt kisses on my neck and my chest it was the best feeling; as I opened my sleepy eyes Edward was looking down at me.

"You can do that forever I said" and he started again.

"I leave for work soon, but I wanted to show you how much I am going to miss you today, and he slid his hand between my thighs and nudged them open. Settling between them he entered me and I loved the feeling of our bodies connected together, after a few minutes I pushed him over and rolled on top of him, lowering myself on to him he groaned with need, as we moved together again, it wasn't long before we both were coming together.

He picked me up and carried me to the shower, turning the water on and climbing in, I was washing his perfect body when it was either the steam of the shower intensifying our desires or just our plain need for each other that he turned me around, kissing the back of neck and reaching around to fondle my breasts, he pushed me further into my need for him.

"Bend over Bella" he said and I did quickly with anticipation of what to come, he slid into me from behind and growled "God Bella you are even tighter this way, I am going to fuck you hard"

Hearing him talk like that turned me on even more and I pushed back onto him and he growled again, placing my hands for support on the wall he held my hips and pushed into me hard, then he was pumping in and out of me harder then I had ever had before and I loved it, craved it, leaning me up a little causing him to go deeper I screamed his name as pleasure coarsed through my body and my legs felt like jelly, he slid out picking up and placing me against the cold tile wall, plunging back in me he continued to pleasure me in ways I had only dreamed of.

"Bella" he moaned over and over again, throwing his head back and pushing in deeper one last time, he kissed me as he released. Holding me tight as we caught our breath before he sat me down on my still shaky legs, we finished our shower and I was counting down until he came home from work.

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AN: Hope it wasn't too lemony for you. I will have the next chapter up by Sunday, there isn't much more that I feel like I can take this story, so I may be wrapping it up soon.

**Thanks!!**


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